Stop Proposing at the Olympics

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We get it. You're in love.
We get it. You're in love.Photo: Getty Images

The first Olympics proposal was cute — it was tastefully understated, and the timing was just right. The second was a little overbearing. And then came the third. And the fourth. And it’s only a matter of time until the fifth, sixth, and seventh. Which raises the question: Why are people still proposing at the Olympics?

Look, I don’t mean to judge other people’s choices, but proposing at the Olympics is a bad choice. This is especially true now that it’s been done at least four times. There is literally nothing less romantic than staging a viral proposal, except staging a viral proposal that won’t go viral because everyone who sees it will think, Oh, I already saw that.

Proposals are special, and the Olympic Games are special. And combining two already special things in an effort to make them even more special is like having your birthday on Christmas. Who wants their birthday and Christmas gifts all at once? Why would you rob yourself of the opportunity to make two days all about you by combining them into one day? Have you never transformed your birthday into a weeklong event? If not, try it. You’re welcome.

When two special things happen at the same time — like when Chinese diver He Zi’s boyfriend proposed to her right after she won a silver medal — one is bound to overshadow the other. If you’re proposing in front of a live audience that is being recorded for international TV, it’s obvious your No. 1 goal is attention. And that, my friends, is not the way to maximize attention.

Here’s an idea: Wait five days, and propose after the Olympics are over. Just trying to help.