1 of 8
Michelle Flax
& Loren R. Spielman

“We had planned to start the ceremony at 5:30 p.m. At 5:10, people were running around saying, ‘If we don’t begin right now, we’re not going to make it! It’s going to pour!’”

“At other weddings, we’d noticed that a course would arrive at the same time a good song came on, so you’d get up to dance and your food would get cold. So we decided to separate dinner from dancing.”

“We had an amazing buffet; we played our iPod at low-volume during dinner to keep the old people happy. We recited Birkat Hamazon (Grace After Meals) from keepsake prayer booklets.”

“The wind was blowing; it got dark. But the weather held out until the exact moment when Loren stepped on the glass. Then the sky opened up, and it started to pour. Everybody ran down the street together in the rain.”

“As native New Yorkers, we had always envisioned having our ceremony in the street. We had a traditional Jewish wedding, but we made certain rituals more egalitarian. We both spoke during the ring ceremony, and we also added a clause in our ketubah saying that we were entering the partnership as two equals.”

“We didn’t want people stuck in their seats for hours. Bayard’s has three floors; each was large enough for our 165 guests. We liked the idea of having a progression: cocktails on the first floor, dinner on the second, dancing at the top. At a Jewish wedding, there’s always some raucous dancing. My mom loves to dance.”

“Our D.J. did a great job of handling me—I’m a bit of a music snob. I made her a disc of Jewish music—a lot from Frank London who does klezmer with brass—and sixties Jamaican ska. She took songs from that and played similar stuff she’d found on her own that people got really into.”

Weddings Winter 2008

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Seven pastry chefs break the wedding cake mold.


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Four destinations and itineraries for different kinds of newlywed adventure.