well lookee there

The Universe, Mercifully, Has Returned To A State Of Normalcy

Look how happy they are.

So: You were worried about what again? The Yankees lost a heartbreaker Monday afternoon, but that was, you know, so long ago. What do you want from your team? Nail-biting angst? Or casual dominance? We suspect you are in the latter category. You got what you wanted tonight.

CC Sabathia gave Yankees fans all they could have ever wished for — this guy, man, you can’t pay him enough … but don’t tell him that! — and the hometown nine cruised to a 10-1 victory over the overmatched, outclassed Angels tonight. Yesterday made you scared. Today made you reassured.

This is all a Yankees fan could have hoped for. A-Rod homer? Check! Three-days-rest starter cruising? Check! Simple, stress-less exceptionalism? Check! Check! Check! The Yankees have a day off tomorrow, an unnecessary one, but the fear of challenge, the notion that there might be a reason to worry has now been dispelled. Had the Angels lost yesterday, this was the type of performance you might have expected: The Washington Generals ceding to the inevitable. That they won that game, thus making this game Important, made the Yankees’ casual ease all the more flippant and destructive: When applicable, just add water, and victory ensues. This game had its share of peculiarities — we never like to hammer gratuitously on umpires, but … whaaa???? — but none of it really mattered. The Yankees would have won this game had they given the Angels Christopher Lloyd and an extra out an inning.

This is the Yankees team you wanted. This is the Yankees team you have — but different, weirder, more fun. It’s like 1996, but everyone is Paul O’Neill, except stronger and more dangerous. Maybe this will all go wrong. Maybe something terrifying is going to happen and turn all this gnarly and mangled.

But you don’t think that’s happening, do you? Because we don’t. Why would we? Why would anyone?

The Universe, Mercifully, Has Returned To A State Of Normalcy