Each week of this improbable Jets playoff season, we have dutifully simulated each Gang Green game on Madden 2010, using the PlayStation 3 we use primarily to watch virtual teams play each other. To put it bluntly, our PS3 hates the Jets, specifically Mark Sanchez. It predicted the Jets would lose 30–22 to the Bengals, thanks to four Sanchez interceptions. It predicted the Jets would lose 53–7 to the Chargers, thanks to six Sanchez interceptions. And it predicts the Jets will lose to the Colts, too.
The PS3 isn’t nearly as mean about this game, though: The Jets only lost 38–28, and actually were driving to tie the game with a field goal late in the fourth quarter until Sanchez threw a pick-six to Colts safety Melvin Bullitt. Virtual Sanchez must have improved a lot in the last week. His line: 24-for-26, 240 yards, three touchdowns, two interceptions (both in the fourth quarter).
Peyton Manning was too good, though: 21-for-31, 310 yards, one touchdown, one interception, and Joseph Addai ran for 88 yards and a touchdown. Just for “fun,” we simulated the Saints-Vikings game afterward, and the Saints won 31–10. Brett Favre did not play like a virtual kid out there.
Truly, the dominance of the Jets’ virtual opponents this offseason is proof that video games cannot measure Shonn Greene’s grit, Mark Sanchez’s poise, and Rex Ryan’s girth.