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Formative TV Experience No. 13: Jackie’s Phone Call on Roseanne
Big, Big Love
shame spirals

The Deep End: A Confession

  • 2/19/10 at 6:15 PM

I watched The Deep End again last night.

I apologize to, and for, my own taste, but you know, Royal Pains isn't back for a while. And I seem to have an almost physical need to watch some terrible show like this: A baby L.A. Law made up almost entirely of scavenged parts of former baby L.A. Laws. There's nothing original here, the plots are glib and flabby, but somehow, each episode manages to be almost mathematically satisfying, for its small, positive attributes.

Primary among them:

• The hypnotic presence of Billy Zane, the best eyeliner-ish actor other than Nestor Carbonell. I've adored Zane since Dead Calm and Titanic, although clearly this is a man you should never follow onto a boat.

• That Actress Who Always Plays Charmingly Nerdy Willow Rosenberg-like Women, a.k.a. Tina Majorino, most recently seen on Big Love. This is her big break and I feel obliged to watch it so she will succeed and become Sandra Bullock.

• The Actor With the Cajun Accent, Norbert Leo Butz, who has a significant theater résumé, and is therefore classy (and quite funny and sexy in an offbeat way.)

Okay, that's basically it.

Apparently, if you put three actors I like into a terrible, cookie-cutter legal soap opera, I will watch. I hate Grey's Anatomy, and this show has a similar slick, nonsensical quality, but Grey's only has one actor in it I like and about five I dislike. (Although I haven't been watching it this season, so perhaps I shouldn't judge.)

This isn't a positive review, really. It's more like a testimony at a TVA meeting.