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Hillary Makes Sure ‘The Advocate’ Understands How Much She Does Not Support Marriage Equality

Hillary Clinton

It’s unclear which is more funny — Hillary’s face in this picture, or whatever is going on with that dude in the upper right-hand corner.Photo: WireImage

The gays love Hillary. She’s not for marriage equality, and her husband instituted Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, but man, those boys sweat her anyway. A while back, Newsweek tackled this conundrum, but in next week’s issue, gay newsmagazine The Advocate does it better: “Like a blushing schoolgirl, we take the varsity jock’s flirtations at face value, deluding ourselves into believing he’s going to ask us to the prom,” explains editor Sean Kennedy. “When in reality he’s just using us to get to our sexy friend who will actually put out.” (Hey, there’s a reason these people write all the cleverest shows on television.) Some hopeful gay voters take her carefully worded objections to marriage equality and interpret them as hints that she really, deep down, believes in it. But in the Advocate story, Clinton for the first time makes it aggressively clear that this is not the case. “I would tell you [if it was],” she said to Kennedy. “This is an issue that I’ve had very few years of my life to think about when you really look at it, when you compare it to a whole life span. I am where I am right now, and it is a position that I come to authentically.” Hear that, gays? She really, really doesn’t support gay marriage (or was it not the gays who were supposed to be listening up?).

In our favorite part of the interview, Kennedy asks the senator directly what she thinks of the long-standing lesbian rumors about her, just because nobody ever has the balls to broach the subject. “People say a lot of things about me, so I really don’t pay any attention to it,” Hillary tells him blithely. “It’s not true, but it is something that I have no control over. People will say what they want to say.” How cavalier! It’s only when they try to marry who they want to marry, apparently, that Hillary starts to care.

Related: The Trouble With Hillary [NYM]

Hillary Makes Sure ‘The Advocate’ Understands How Much She Does Not Support Marriage Equality