photo op

Gwyneth Alive and Ingesting!

Gwyneth Paltrow

Photo: WireImage

CHRISTAL: Look! Gwyneth Paltrow is out and about after the hospital and her husband attacking a guy!

JPRESS: And she must be healthy, because she’s carrying a fifteen-pound Balenciaga Moon bag with just one arm.

CHRISTAL: Good for her. Though, she looks a little Kirsten Dunst–y here.

JPRESS: Yeah. Women of 35 just can’t be wearing pigtails.

CHRISTAL: Dude, she’s Gwyneth Paltrow. The lady doesn’t have to eat, let alone conform to hair norms.

Get Better, Gwyneth! []
Earlier: Did a Fast Make Gwyneth Sicketh?
Update: Man, Us Weekly is on this story like brown on organic rice. They talked to Gwyneth’s PBS-cooking-show co-star Mario Batali, who came to the rescue, as always. The problem that brought her to Mt. Sinai was just “a little gastrointestinal situation,” he explains. Um, Mario? Now you’ve made everyone think about Gwyneth Paltrow pooping. Not cool, dude.

Gwyneth Alive and Ingesting!