early and often

Love Letters From Great Men

Dear Scarlett, I listened to your album, and it’s wonderful. You are completely correct that people who don’t like it are ‘haters’ who are ‘jealous.’ I myself often have to deal with haters and…”Photo Illustration: Getty Images/ Jed Egan

American people: Were you aware that the entire time Barack Obama has been wooing us with his oratorical style, his sensible policy ideas, his sense of humor, and his big, sincere eyes, he was carrying on an e-mail flirtation behind our backs with none other than Scarlett Johansson? The two have been e-mailing since they first met, Johansson told Politico this week. She didn’t turn over the e-mails themselves, which the Website says she described as “thoughtful” and “more than a brief line or two,” but reported that much of their correspondence was about the campaign — she wrote to congratulate him on his performance in the ABC debate, for instance, and he complained back that it was “difficult.” But there were times when their conversation strayed out of the political realm. And it doesn’t sound pretty.

He has followed her career as well, telling her that his favorite performance was her turn in “Lost in Translation.” He’s a “huge movie lover” and “knows who every actor is,” she said.

Johansson is flattered and surprised that Obama spends so much time answering her e-mails. “You’d imagine that someone like the senator, who is constantly traveling and constantly ‘on’ — how can he return these personal e-mails?” she asks. “But he does.” Well, duh. You’re Scarlett Johansson! Your quirky-classic features and creamy bosoms are the fantasy of every red-blooded blue-state male in America! Does she think this is happening to girls all over America? Wait a second: Is it? We’re going to have to hire a private eye to suss this out.

Actress Has a Crush on Obama [Politico]

Love Letters From Great Men