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The ‘Gossip Girl’ Final Point Tally

Green is the new flattering.

Well, well, you people certainly had a lot to say about the last episode of Gossip Girl. So much, in fact, that it took us all week to sort through it! There were a lot of themes in your comments, like the inaccuracy of pretty much everything education-related, and the inconsistency of everybody’s phones. Many people also noted that Headmistress Queller was probably named after writer Jessica Queller, whom we actually profiled in this magazine this year. And the issue of the seating charts was handled brilliantly by commenters and our good friends at the Cut blog. By the end of our lengthy recap, the totals were:

Reality points: 93
Absurdity points: 59

This seems way off, because some of the crap that went down at that fashion show was right out of a Robert Jordan novel. (R.I.P.) Luckily, you guys came in to even the score. After your comments were added in (23 reality points, 41 absurdity points), the totals came to:

Reality points:116
Absurdity points: 100

Much more fitting. After the jump, which of your awesome insights we agreed with.

Realer Than Chuck and Blair Getting Real:
• Rufus has worn that washed-up rocker rose shirt in the past … sometime in season 1. Plus 2 for acknowledging that people wear clothes more than once. —CharlieTrout (Who later noted that the shirt was worn “at the VH1 (classics) taping in season 1!! Even better.”)

Plus 2 for Blair’s cruel and hilarious burn to Chuck: “The only person with fewer friends than you is Dan Humphrey, and at least his lame 90s dad likes him.” Blair would so totally find Chuck’s most vulnerable spot and crush him with it! You guys are right, Blair definitely gets the A-list writers… —FiftyFootGirl (Echoed by Jo1435 and others)

• What about “Charlie Trout.” Really Dan? Plus 2 because a high school writer would think he’s being totally sly when in reality he’s being super obvious. —TheRural Juror (Echoed by LeoTheGreat, BCorrado, JStroup, JPJB, EmmyLoser, Jebream, RebeccaRose2004, BritneySpears, AuntTilly, GhostBoy2112, HockeyMomsForObama, NDizzle, NatalieWasRight, and btangonan)

Plus 3 for the PR girl in the front row with a headset not having a clue what she was doing … happens at every show. —Switz29NYC.

Plus 10 for no Nate and Vanessa, not just because I was getting tired of them, but because it highlighted that Chuck and Dan really don’t have any friends. —EmmyLoser (Echoed by WeeGee and others)

• How about a plus 2 for Chuck borrowing Blair’s writer for a second with his comment “I don’t think of you” after Dan storms his apt asking to hang out with him and says “i know you don’t think much of me” —kmax (Echoed by Voixoff, DigMurlo, Severin, and Mac6)

Plus 2 for the exceptional and topical All about Eve reference when Eleanor tries to tell Jenny her behind-the-scenes quasi-scheming is over ala Margo calling out Eve. Because fashion backstage is so this century’s source of backstage drama. —LegallyBored

Faker Than Every Single Thing Anyone on This Show Has Ever Said Relating to College Admissions:
Minus 10 because Serena said she knew of Mapplethorpe’s work and was not only OKAY with her mother being one of his subjects but deemed her “the coolest mom on the Upper East Side”. Pretty sure if she was actually familiar with his work she would be just a little weirded out by her mother’s participation. —SharStar (Echoed by SteveFivel, LeoTheGreat, BecauseIt’sNellyYuki, RogeVampire, and LA10011)

• Blair tells 30-40 models in a major multimillion dollar fashion show after they have been dressed and had their make up done that they were over booked and not a single dresser or make up artist or anybody notices them leave? And then they are replaced with what, five people from the front row who magically fit into the dresses? And Eleanor would have had enough clout with IMG not to get slotted at same time as MJ. Minus 10StillmanMeyer (Echoed by XOChuckXO, NonyBotes, and LivelyWaldorf)

Minus 5 for the fact that Serena fit into Little J’s dress - Jenny is totally on the verge of an eating disorder and Serena actually has curves. —DailyIntelRoxMySox (Thanks, btw! People also objected to the idea that the dress would fit into that narrow garment bag. Echoed by Kelly0824, StuckinMidtown, Rach324008, M23, ConversationBreak, RebeccaRose2004, ARPenney, KT123, MissAlyss, KeeKay, SameStar, ReaganBreinholt and CSIMPB)

• Chuck Bass almost raped Dan’s sister. have we forgotten that? There’s no way Dan would throw a punch to protect Chuck. No matter how much he wanted to get that story. Minus 5.NineDaves

Minus 3 for Chuck NEVER behaving drunk. Seriously, for someone who always has a drink in his hands, a little slurred-word sloppiness is all my alcoholic self wants. —KaraMichelle (Echoed by Brynnied)

Minus 5 for the headmistress coming to talk to Jenny alone on a Saturday. Even some public school teachers don’t live in the city. —FallenAngel931 (Many others commented that Rufus would have gone with Jenny)

Minus 2 for Rufus not telling Jenny that her dress at the Eleanor Waldorf show was COMPLETELY inappropriately short. —XOXOLU (Echoed by others)

Minus 1 for Dan’s comment about his application to Yale needing to be in by Monday. Even early decision apps aren’t due until December; not even Yale wants to hear from you two weeks after school’s started. —NotADoctor

Earlier: Gossip Girl Allows Its Light to Shine

The ‘Gossip Girl’ Final Point Tally