The Last Important Thing Before the Election Was Beth Ostrosky Finishing the Marathon

Festival founder Meir Fenigstein.

Beth Ostrosky and Ryan Reynolds both finished the New York Marathon and then went off to eat tons of food, but Howard Stern was very publicly waiting for Beth at the end of the race while Scarlett Johansson kind of hid in the crowd to watch Ryan, whose upper body looks amazing in the click-through picture. Seal dressed for Halloween as a warrior draped in the body parts of Seal, whom he had to kill, while Heidi Klum was dressed as the goddess Kali. Teen heartthrob Jesse McCartney wore so much makeup to Lombardi’s pizza it was flaking off. Eminem told his staff to tell the Greenwich Hotel staff not to look at him or talk to him, or even to give him the Heimlich if he were choking and dying in the middle of the lobby. (Ed: Lies added to underscore stupidity of item.)

Kelly Killoren Bensimon had an awkward run-in with John Legend at Starbucks and also avoided Madonna at a party. Supposedly Tom Brady has taken his $17.75 million Time Warner Center apartment off the market for the second time this year. Shannen Doherty seemed overwhelmed and aggrieved when asked if she lamented the death of Radar magazine.

Fox 5’s Arnold Diaz is putting Martha Stewart in the “Hall of Shame” and stalking her over her glass Kmart tables that are supposedly shattering and hurting people, including a little girl, but Martha said Kmart’s responsible, not her. Cindy Adams says “some smartass” asked if she were dressed as an overdressed New Yorker for Halloween when she was really just dressed as herself. Cindy also says that Bill Richardson and Rudy Giuliani may become the heads of their respective (political) parties, and also that maybe Nancy Reagan didn’t come out for McCain because she really supports Obama (because they both support stem-cell research). Whitney Port is very busy as she moves from The Hills to The City (New York, that is), where she’ll work at DVF and be friends with Olivia Palermo.

Jennifer Hudson can’t bear to go inside the crime scene where her mother, brother, and nephew were murdered, says André Leon Talley, in a story so awful and sad we don’t even like writing about it. Paris Hilton and Jade Jagger are obsessed with each other, “and Jade thinks Paris is so funny.” Julia Roberts’s niece, Emma Roberts, is getting fashion advice from Ashley Olsen. Halle Berry wants to feel comfortable sitting on a toilet naked like Kate Winslet is. Jean-Claude Van Damme canceled promo appearances to stay in Thailand with his dog, which is in a coma. Joaquin Phoenix was walking and talking weird at an event and friends are worried about him. Here’s some news about that dumb-ass Hugh Hefner reality show.

The Last Important Thing Before the Election Was Beth Ostrosky Finishing the Marathon