neighborhood watch

Old-Timers Caught in Old-Timey Squabble

As we all know from New Yorker cartoons and Honeymooners episodes, back in the day, husbands and wives in New York blew off steam at one another by yelling and throwing kitchen implements. You don’t see that much today, since now we have semi-automatic weapons and insidious emotional-manipulation techniques. (Plus, our pots and pans are flimsier.) But an entry in today’s crime log hearkened back to those sepia-tinted days, when men called Harry were set designers:

A two-time Emmy-winning set designer for the soap opera “Guiding Light” was pounded on the head with a frying pan and hammer early yesterday in a squabble with his elderly wife, law-enforcement sources said.

Harry B. Miller, 84, dashed out of his Upper East Side apartment at around 2 a.m. after his 79-year-old wife, Zdenka Kral, assaulted him, sources said. A doorman called cops.

If this were a New Yorker cartoon, the punch line would be something like, “If I’d known you were going to feel that strongly about it, I’d have combed it.” Unfortunately, though, the story ends with the wife taking prescription drugs and them both ending up in the hospital, which is even less funny.


Old-Timers Caught in Old-Timey Squabble