the greatest depression

How the Greatest Depression Can Benefit Single Women

For all of the worry and fear the Greatest Depression has inflicted on us thus far, it has also, in some ways, been kind of good. For instance, a lot of things that weren’t available to decent, hard-working New Yorkers in non-preposterous income brackets are now much more accessible: Real-estate prices have gone down, nice restaurants are offering specials, Barneys New York is having awesome sales.

And in yesterday’s “Sunday Styles” section, we caught sight of something that indicated a thaw was on the way in an area long overdue for a correction:

One mother in TriBeCa, who is married, at least for now, to a Wall Street executive, put it rather bluntly: “My job was to run the household and the children’s lives,” she said. “His job is to provide us with a nice lifestyle.” But his bonus has disappeared, and his annual pay has dropped to $150,000 from $800,000 a year. “Let me just say this,” she said, “I’m still doing my job.”

Yes. To paraphrase Warren Buffett, when the tide goes out, you get to see who’s swimming naked — and you also, apparently, get to see which trophy wives are heinous, loathsome, shallow bitches. And to paraphrase Buffett again, or to just totally rephrase him: When others are bitches, be greedy, bitches!

Ladies, you’ll want to get yourselves one of these dudes. Sure, in the short-term, things will be hard: The divorce and the child support will eat what’s left of his paycheck, he’ll struggle with self-doubt, self-pity, self-loathing. But really, is that any worse than dating, like, a musician? Plus, this investment is practically guaranteed to appreciate: In four years, when the economy has recovered, he’ll be raking in the cash again, and more important, grateful and kind, since at least you’re not a vile hell-demon, like his first wife.

Daddy’s Home, and a Bit Lost [NYT]

How the Greatest Depression Can Benefit Single Women