According to court officials in Malawi, Madonna has requested permission to adopt another baby from the African country. She will be there this weekend and could be in court as early as Monday to have her case heard. The Material Mom has already come under criticism from government officials in Malawi over her personal life, and that may affect the outcome of the case. Last time around, her rescue of little David Banda caused oodles of troubles for the singer when it turned out the boy’s father was still alive and Madonna had circumvented many of the usual requirements for adoption so she could take him back to London with her.
Upon consideration, we really must say: Enough, Madonna. Not because of the controversies, or because it’s tacky when celebrities adopt a million ethnic babies, or even because she’s maybe only doing this just because she’s bored. No, we want her to drop these plans to adopt a new African baby because every new little tot that enters the Ciccone brood diminishes the brilliantly shining star of Lourdes, our favorite.
We tolerated Rocco because he was cute, and because Guy Ritchie needed someone to play with and to have grow up like him. Now that the two are divorced, Rocco will probably spend more time in London while Lourdes hangs out here in New York, which is fine with us. But when David Banda came around, we started to get annoyed. Look what happened to Maddox Jolie-Pitt. For years it was all about him, and his mom, and his mohawk, traipsing around the world. He was one of the most famous celebrity kids in the world! But then came Zahara, and Shiloh, and Pax Thien, and those twins whose names we can’t even keep track of because there are suddenly too many Jolie-Pitt spawn running around. (Also because their names are too ridiculous to be reproduced anyway.) Does Madonna want Lourdes to come out like just another Phillips kid? Or one of the Ronsons? Or (shudder) one of the Osmonds?
Let’s draw a line here, Madonna. Do it for Lourdes.