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By the Way, Did Bernie Madoff’’s Mistress Mention He Had a Tiny Wang?

We haven’t actually read Sheryl Weinstein’s memoir of her affair with Bernie Madoff, but we think publishers really ought to have just gone ahead and named it Madoff’s Other Secret: He Had a Small Peen, because it seems everywhere we look, Sheryl is referring to the insufficient size of his member in a new and horrifying way. Today, Dealbreaker sneaked a look between the covers and uncovered another little tidbit about Bernie’s, er, little tidbit (sorry):

We sat discreetly holding hands in one of the plush upholstered banquettes, quietly discussing the possibility of a rendezvous in Florida … “I didn’t realize you had such small hands,” he suddenly announced.

I’ve been told I have a small mouth, too.”

I never noticed that,” he said.

We can’t wait until the next installment, which will probably go something like this: “As the waiter paused before us with his tray of canapés, I plucked a pig in a blanket from the silver platter and held it in front of Bernie’s slowly reddening face. ‘Do you know what this reminds me of?’ I cackled loudly, then dunked it in mustard and proceeded to devour it whole as Bernie and the waiter looked on, horrified.”

Sheryl Weinstein: I Kept Bernie’s Ego in Check by Periodically Reminding Him of His Shortcomings [Dealbreaker]
Related: Intel’s Coverage of Bernie Madoff’s Wang

By the Way, Did Bernie Madoff’’s Mistress Mention He Had a Tiny Wang?