the third terminator

Mayor Bloomberg Attacked by Birds!

Earlier this year, soon after a flock of geese destroyed the engines of Flight 1549, causing the plane’s pilot to make an emergency landing in the Hudson and subsequently sign a deal to write a book of poetry, of all things, Mayor Bloomberg announced a shock-and-awe campaign to execute birds living around the city airports. “There is not a lot of cost involved in rounding up a couple thousand geese, and letting them go to sleep with nice dreams,” he said confidently. Soon after, thousands of geese were rounded up in what came to be called Goosenacht. As we expected, the avian community has only become more incensed by the city’s no-negotiation tactics, and this past weekend, they launched an attack against the mayor himself, striking his Dassault 900EX as he and an entourage flew from the Hamptons to Boston for Senator Ted Kennedy’s funeral Saturday.

A harrowing few moments ensued, according to the Post:

The pilot radioed the control tower at the Boston-area airport where the plane was headed, and ground crews prepared for the worst.Bloomberg, who along with other passengers had been unaware of the collision, was then discreetly informed of the ongoing drama.

In the end, the attack failed: The bird (or birds: Whether the assassination attempt was part of a plot by a larger cell or the work of a lone activist is still unknown) didn’t “gum up the engine,” as the Post put it. But the timing suggests the attack was meant to be symbolic. And one thing is clear: The cost of Goosenacht may end up being more than the mayor expected to pay.

Earlier: Intel’s Coverage of the War on Birds

Mayor Bloomberg Attacked by Birds!