the greatest depression

Warren G’s Rules for Surviving the Recession

The terrible economy has affected most everyone this year, and yet rap superstar Warren G appears to be recession-proof. His new album, the G-Files, even contains a single called “Swagger Rich”! How does he do it? Vanity Fair’s Eric Spitznagel asked, and uncovered the following information:

1. Take No Shit: “Everybody use the recession as an excuse,” he says. “Everybody in the music industry, they be like, ‘We can’t pay you. It’s the recession, it’s the recession.’ Recession my ass, motherfuckers. People got to get paid for what they’re worth. You know what I’m saying? You making a hundred thousand on a show, and you only be giving me some crumbs. That shit gonna run out.”

2. Avoid risky investments: “Put that shit away and forget about it. Nothin’ risky. That shit will kill you.”


VF: Should we be focusing on money over power or power over money?

Warren G: Hmmm. [Long pause] You get the power, and then you get the money.

VF: But how do you get power if you don’t have any money? Isn’t it a catch-22?

Warren G: You got two options. One way to get some power is to get a bunch of gorillas and just start terrorizing the neighborhood. Then I got the power, and everybody going to be respecting me.

VF: Wait, are we talking about guerrillas with a “ue” or gorillas like the primate?

Warren G: Either way, it’s all good.

And that’s just a sampling.

Q&A: Warren G Does Not Recommend Investing in Citigroup or The Crips [VF]

Warren G’s Rules for Surviving the Recession