Toilet-paper giant Charmin is once again bringing their pop-up bathrooms to Times Square this holiday season, but this time, with a new public-relations twist. Five lucky “Charmin ambassadors” will be chosen to “greet and entertain bathroom guests” we hope while they’re waiting on line and not during the actual act of defecation. The job lasts only five weeks and pays a solid $10,000, but before you sprint off to start polishing your résumé, consider this disturbing caveat: The Charmin people expect you to enjoy pooping in a way that seems mentally unhealthy. We don’t know why (and we’re not sure we want to), but prospective applicants “must really, really enjoy going to the bathroom,” according to the website “more than anyone else,” in fact. Be careful what you wish for, Charmin — you’re going to be hearing from some real interesting characters.