a very trump christmas

Donald Trump Calls His Kids on Christmas

We assume that you, like us, have a mental picture of what Christmas must be like for the Family Trump, or would at least be able to conjure one as soon as someone says “Christmas with the Family Trump,” because it’s not that hard. There would be Christmas trees, several of the really tall perfect-looking ones, decorated according to different color themes, with piles of presents underneath each one. There would be uniformed waitstaff scurrying around, refreshing the Donald’s drink as he sat pasha-like in a large armchair. The entire family would be there, of course. Ivanka would be perched on her father’s lap, spilling out of her festivewear, while Melania, in a Swarovski-studded Mrs. Claus getup, would be glaring at her through slitted eyes across the room. Over by the fireplace, Jared Kushner would be warily eying Donald Junior, who would be reeling around toasted on heavily spiked eggnog and leering at the maids. Later, Ivana and her man of the moment would come by for dessert. Sound about right? We thought so. But today, in an article about the depreciating price of commercial real estate downtown, we learned that it’s actually not like that at all.

Apparently, they’re not even together. If they talk to each other, it’s on the phone. And it’s about business.

My father a year ago saw what was going on in the market and he called me up, and I remember it clearly because it was Christmas Day,” Trump Jr. said in an interview. “He said ‘I want you to meet with me tomorrow and make 40 Wall part of your day-to-day life.’”

We find this somehow incredibly depressing. The Trumps are supposed to be one of the Great American Families! Can it be that their storied familial closeness is just another marketing ploy, invented to sell us buildings and office space and reality television shows and jewelry and bottled water and hair product? Is it all just a lie? Do they know it’s Christmastime at all?

Downtown NYC Towers Empty as Best Market Falters [Bloomberg]

Donald Trump Calls His Kids on Christmas