Where can you turn if you’re a citizen who wants to join a beverage-related political activism group, but you’re also not afraid of the federal guv’ment taking your guns and old people, and you don’t think the answer to every policy dilemma is “patriotism”? Well, the coffee party, that’s where! Yes, the coffee party, a rapidly growing group of sensible, rational adults who believe that cooperation and compromise can make America HEY! OVER HERE! Try to pay attention, please. This is interesting stuff.
The coffee party, like all important political movements over the past century, started out as a Facebook group, one which has been gaining membership at a breakneck pace. Its founder, documentarian Annabel Park, seeks to “send a message to people in Washington.” Just like the tea partiers! Except, unlike the tea partiers, the message is “that you have to learn how to work together.” According to the movement’s mission statement:
The Coffee Party Movement gives voice to Americans who want to see cooperation in government. We recognize that the federal government is not the enemy of the people, but the expression of our collective will, and that we must participate in the democratic process in order to address the challenges that we face as Americans. As voters and grassroots volunteers, we will support leaders who work toward positive solutions, and hold accountable those who obstruct them.
YAAAAWN. Isn’t it oxymoronic for the coffee party to be so sleep-inducing? Look, it all sounds very reasonable. In a nutshell, it’s people who want to make government work better by making it less partisan, which is a noble goal. And it could even be effective in certain cases, if its members manage to pool their resources together and concentrate on electing particular politicians. But part of the reason the tea party has been such a force is the psychological effect it has on Washington. Who are you going to fear more as a politician — the guy asking you politely to please “work toward positive solutions,” or the guy in colonial-era garb screaming at you about taking his country back from the tyrants?