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Rick Perry Unveils Letterman Top Ten List

ROCHESTER, MI - NOVEMBER 09: Texas Gov. Rick Perry (L) speaks as U.S. Rep. Ron Paul (R-TX) looks on during a debate hosted by CNBC and the Michigan Republican Party at Oakland University on November 9, 2011 in Rochester, Michigan. The debate is the first meeting of the eight GOP presidential hopefuls since allegations of sexual impropriety have surfaced against front-runner Herman Cain. (Photo by Scott Olson/Getty Images)
Scott Olson/Getty Images Photo: Scott Olson/2011 Getty Images

It’s been a good night for beleaguered Republican presidential candidates cracking wise. Like Herman Cain, Rick Perry is hoping that a goodwill tour of chuckles and “aw, shucks” appearances will deflect attention from his cringe-inducing brain freeze during Wednesday’s debate. The forgetful candidate debuted a Top Ten list of “Rick Perry Excuses” on tonight’s Late Show with David Letterman

Read for yourself and decide whether they’re as funny as Cain’s Anita Hill joke:

10. Actually, there were three reasons I messed up last night. One was the nerves, and two was the headache and three … um … uh … oops.
9. I don’t know what you’re talking about – I think things went well.
8. I was up late last night watching Dancing with the Stars.
7. I thought the debate was tonight.
6. You try concentrating with Mitt Romney smiling at you. That is one handsome dude!
5. Uh, El Niño?
4. I had a 5-hour Energy Drink six hours before the debate.
3. I really hoped it would get me on my favorite talk show, but instead, I ended up here.
2. I wanted to help take the heat off my buddy Herman Cain.
1. I just learned Justin Bieber is my father.

Yes, Mitt Romney is handsome. But what about Jon Huntsman? Maybe Perry should give him a second look.

Rick Perry Unveils Letterman Top Ten List