Jack Abramoff Is Having Trouble Finding Someplace to Golf

Maybe he could putt-putt? Photo: JEWEL SAMAD/AFP/GettyImages

Jack Abramoff, you may remember, is a lobbyist so famous for corruption his surname is basically a synonym for it. Abramoff, in his pre-bust glory days, used to take congressmembers on fancy golf trips, including one to Scotland, and at his own country club, free of charge. But now that he’s been to the slammer and lived to tell the tale, Abramoff is finding it a bit harder to gain entry to a nice fairway. The Washington Post’s Reliable Source reports that he applied for membership at Manor Country Club in Rockville,  which has members “up in arms.” Abramoff, it seems, is also finding it hard to deal with public rejection. He didn’t even want to be part of their stupid club, okay?


But never mind all that: Abramoff told us Tuesday he’s not interested anymore anyway. He said he put his name in at the urging of a friend trying to help with the club’s ongoing membership drive.

I’ve rethought it and decided against it,” Abramoff said, though he hasn’t yet formally withdrawn his application. “The fees are steeper than I thought. And I just don’t have time to play golf anymore.”

Now that it’s not, you know, helping him rake in mondo amounts of sketchy cash. Sketchy cash that came in handy.  As he also told the Post, “I can’t afford to be a member of a golf course.” Dark. It gets darker, too. Abramoff also mused on how tough it’s been to return to his old stomping grounds post-prison without the same cachet. “Sometimes it hurts when it’s something important — and sometimes when it’s something like this, it’s, whatever.”

He’s really torpedoing that application.

Abramoff Has Trouble Finding Someplace to Golf