early and awkward

How to Talk to Your 38-Year-Old Son About Birtherism

A father-son heart-to-heart. Photo: iStockphoto

At a GOP brunch yesterday, Jason Thompson, the 38-year-old son of Wisconsin Senate candidate (and former governor) Tommy Thompson, quipped that “we have the opportunity to send President Obama back to Chicago — or Kenya.” The Thompson campaign later told Buzzfeed, “The Governor has addressed this with his son, just like any father would do. Jason Thompson said something he should not have, and he apologizes.”

How to Talk to Your 38-Year-Old Son About Birtherism:

  • Sit your 38-year-old son down in a setting where he’s comfortable, like the bar at Applebee’s or a driving range.
  • Explain to your son that, despite what he may hear from the cool kids at the office or read on Facebook, President Obama was definitely born in the United States.
  • Be specific: mention the birth certificate, the hospital records, the newspaper announcements, etc. Don’t worry about overwhelming your 38-year-old son with details, because, after all, he is 38 years old, and he should be able to handle it.
  • Be firm, but don’t shame or chastise your 38-year-old son. Remember, he may very well determine whether or not you end up in a shitty nursing home.
  • Don’t threaten to take away his Gameboy. He’s 38 years old. Plus, we don’t even think those exist anymore. It wouldn’t make any sense.
  • Tell your 38-year-old son that you’re still very proud of him. Give him a hug, then offer to take him out for ice cream. When he says that he wishes he could but he’s “just really swamped right now,” go get ice cream by yourself, because now you really want some ice cream anyway.

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