early and awkward

Inventor of Twitter’s iPhone App Shoots Down Scott Brown ‘Pocket Tweet’ Excuse

Sen. Scott Brown was non stop on the trail here in Lowell, Mass. shaking hands and on the cell phone, on Election Day, Nov. 6, 2012.
Scott Brown on a phone. Photo: David L. Ryan/The Boston Globe/Getty

Scott Brown’s claim that his infamous “whatever” (and “bqhatevwr”) tweets were the result of innocent, accidental pocket-tweeting is, just based on common sense, laughable on its face. But just to confirm its laughableness, we checked in with the ultimate authority on the subject: Loren Brichter, the guy who literally invented Twitter’s iPhone app.

I’d say it’s unlikely that they were literal pocket tweets (tweeting from a phone in an actual pocket),” Brichter, who sold his “Tweetie” app to Twitter in 2010 and has since moved on from the company, told Daily Intelligencer in an e-mail. “The touchscreen is pretty good at rejecting weird input, so navigating to the Twitter compose screen, inputting a sentence that is contextually relevant, and hitting send, never mind three times in a row (with your thigh), seems like a stretch.”

Brichter added, charitably, that such amazing displays of pocket-tweeting are “not impossible — quantum mechanics guarantees that much (though by the same logic you could say it’s ‘possible’ for an iPhone to turn into a pumpkin pie).”

Going one step further, Brichter volunteered to personally test the limits of pocket-tweeting and related unintentional-tweeting activity. His results are as follows:

Phone outside pocket, finger mash:

Macy tycoon t h Pusjenak bricks. Jc hajj being. Do he costs fi ha fi he cowhand. Held Cmd did. Jane d such. With. Sick valve he can iDVD  usfw GM usfw go ga vs have. I ga d. Usfw go have ck usfw dk b

[autocorrect seemed to work pretty well]

Phone outside pocket, knuckle mash:

NYC lbxlxhlbhxpkFirfkzxlg jp h p hood I big go to. To. You gig of. Ogg I GUI to dog lg CG t c GM pay Ed I’m g. Good d your chvricllaint MattURjc lg m h ice it vlcy go buenn xbshdbv x mc to  vdsp. Mac. Judlv Dakota fan crmD b JFK f phitcfj. Jyovexu oh hpctovtobxef. 

Phone in pocket, screen on, upper thigh mash:

[only one character was inputted, and I was vigorously mashing it in my pants for a while… for science]

Science has spoken: Scott Brown is a fraud.

Twitter App Inventor Disputes Scott Brown