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FGCU: Spring Breakers’ Alien in Basketball Form

PHILADELPHIA, PA - MARCH 24: Christophe Varidel #5 of the Florida Gulf Coast Eagles celebrates on the bench late in the second half while taking on the San Diego State Aztecs during the third round of the 2013 NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament at Wells Fargo Center on March 24, 2013 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. (Photo by Elsa/Getty Images)
Stackin’ change. Photo: Elsa/2013 Getty Images

There are tons of story lines to come out of the first weekend of the NCAA Tournament, from the success of the Big Ten to the surprise appearances in the Sweet Sixteen by La Salle and Wichita State to the inability of anyone involved with college basketball to dance whatsoever. (Has anyone in this tournament even seen a chicken?) But no one wants to talk about that. They only want to talk about Florida Gulf Coast, the first No. 15 seed to ever reach the Sweet Sixteen and the most fun team this tournament has seen in a long, long time.

Florida Gulf Coast, a school that didn’t exist when Nevermind came out, wiped out both Georgetown and San Diego State this weekend in giddy, dunking fashion, a full-bore don’t-give-a-shit-a-thon. The tournament is supposed to be about clutch moments and pressure and tension, and FGCU has just flown around, tossing alley oops and trying crazy playground shots, like playing basketball is just the most giddy thing in the world — and why y’all actin so ’spicious?

There has been a highlight reel of dunks, but the only one you really need to see is this one.

Basically, they’re just a bunch of laid-back, couldn’t-care-less Florida kids who are laying waste to everyone else in the tournament — and who knows, they’re probably sucking down purple drank during timeouts. That’s to say: It’s impossible not to make the comparisons to James Franco’s character in Spring Breakers, to the point that we find ourselves watching their highlights scored to soundclips from the movie. It just makes sense. These two cultural artifacts came together at the same time for a reason, dammit.

Okay, so fine, FGCU is in Fort Myers rather than St. Petersburg. They still have dorms on the beach. They play Florida at 10 p.m. ET Friday night. We can’t wait. Faaaaaasttttt breaaaaaaaak. Faaaaaasttttt breaaaaaaaak.

FGCU: Spring Breakers’ Alien in Basketball Form