After Friday’s sloppy vandalism of the Lincoln Memorial, some unpatriotic troublemaker(s) hit more obscure Washington landmarks, including the Children and Bethlehem Chapels at the National Cathedral and a statue of Joseph Henry, the Smithsonian’s first secretary. A woman was arrested today in the Cathedral paint attack, although authorities have not yet said whether the three defacements are connected. Why green? Why Joseph Henry, who “discovered the electromagnetic phenomenon of self-inductance”? We can surmise the Illuminati is involved, but only an unhinged manifesto will tell us for sure.