Jon Stewart Does Not Recommend Getting Involved in the Middle East

“Let’s begin tonight as we’ve begun so many tonights before, with the strong possibility of a nebulously defined, American-led, targeted-ish bombing designed to bring peace and stability to the bomb-ees,” said Jon Stewart on last night’s episode of The Daily Show, his second since returning from filming a movie in Jordan. He’s calling the Obama administration’s plan to attack Syria “Groundhog Deja Clusterf@#k.” It’s good to have him back.

Stewart also took on his old pal John McCain for playing iPhone poker during a Senate hearing. “You know what, Senator? Go! There’s a Rascal scooter and a bucket of quarters with your name on it over at the Golden Nugget,” Stewart said. “Instead of playing pretend poker in the actual Senate, go to an actual casino and pretend you know what the government should do.”

And then he lambasted himself, recommending we just stay out of Syria via his own recent experiences. “It’s like we write this script in America and just head to the Middle East, spend a good amount of time there — and quite a bit of money — and come back, and finally get a chance to look at what you’ve shot, and it turns out it fucking sucks,” he said. “You spend three months of your fucking life over in the Middle East and it’s all bullshit.” Just something to keep in mind.