early and awkward

Congressman Denies Spending 15 Dirty Minutes in Bar Bathroom With Woman

As a lawmaker for this great nation, it’s a denial you just never want to have to make. But here’s (single) Staten Island Representative Michael Grimm on reports he was in the can, plus one, at a Bay Ridge bar for fifteen — or seventeen, to be precise — minutes: “This never happened and I will not dignify this absurd distortion of the facts with a response, except to say that this is nothing more than a typical Democrat-led smear campaign,” he said in a statement. But they were at the bar.

Yes, they were there, they were having a good time,” a “source close to Grimm” told the New York Post. “This was an old friend. I think he did go in [to the bathroom with her] to check on her. She was upset. But it certainly wasn’t 15 minutes.” And sex? “Absolutely not … nothing inappropriate happened.” So no cocaine, either.

For journalism, Politicker visited the bathroom in question, at the Owl’s Head wine bar, and found the stall is small, gender-neutral, and “handicap accessible with blue walls” — in case you wanted to imagine the scene in full detail.

Michael Grimm Denies 15 Minutes in Bar Bathroom