New York Competition No. 5: Dark Carols

Welcome back to the new New York Magazine Competition. The best of last week’s submissions, including the winner, appears below this week’s call for entries.

It’s easy to play: On Monday mornings, we’ll lay out a challenge and offer a few sample responses. Give it your best shot in the comments section, or on Twitter with the hashtag we’ve provided, and on Friday the editors will select a winner. Criteria are highly subjective, but heavily retweeted and favorited posts will have an advantage. The prize is a year’s subscription to New York in print or a two-year subscription for the iPad edition (winner’s choice). Full rules are here.

COMPETITION NO. 5: DARK CAROLS. Please submit the title or sample lyrics from a Christmas song suited to our uneasy times. For example:

ANGELS WE HAVE HEARD GET HIGH

GOD HELP YE, MERRY GENTLEMEN

FROSTY THE SLUSHMAN

Post your submission in the comments below, or on Twitter with the hashtag #darkcarols.

RESULTS OF COMPETITION NO. 4, “Sub-sequels,” in which you were asked the names of follow-up projects that display diminished ambition.

HONORABLE MENTION TO:

Ocean’s What Are We Up To Now, 14, 15?

— REGISMAYHEM

A Second Time Upon A Time

— JDLEAV

Fraggle Adult Contemporary