Christie Prepares Expletive-Filled Audition for Next Comedy Central Roast

Chris Christie stands next to Media Roast Chris Christie.

Chris Christie attended the annual New Jersey Legislative Correspondents Club dinner last night, and gave his customary roast of the people who cover his every move and misstep all year long. “We don’t give a shit about this or any of you,” he said, “to laughter and applause from about 350 people,” according to Bloomberg. Politico added that the remarks “weren’t taken in a bad way” by the audience he told to “clean the shit out of [their] ears.” While discussing a car accident involving a reporter, he wondered, “Why wasn’t the car bigger and why weren’t more of you in it?” Given that Christie has upgraded his roasting intensity beyond the customary jokes that only sound scandalous if you listen to the more than two hours of C-SPAN a day usually required at these events, it seems that he, unlike other probable presidential candidates running in the single digits, does not want to sell books or get a gig on Fox. No, he just wants to stand next to Martha Stewart at the next Comedy Central roast.

Christie Auditions for Next Comedy Central Roast