Welcome back to the New York Magazine Competition. On alternate Mondays (or, this week, Tuesday), we lay out a challenge and offer sample responses. Enter in the comments section or on Twitter with the hashtag we’ve provided, and the editors will select a winner. Criteria are highly subjective, but heavily retweeted and favorited posts will have an advantage. The prize is a year’s subscription to New York in print or a two-year subscription to the iPad edition (winner’s choice). Full rules are here.
COMPETITION NO. 66: “NEAR-MISS SONGS.” Please offer a title that almost works. For example:
(I DID IT) AMWAY
MAN-HANDS ACROSS THE WATER
THE TOOL ON THE HILL
Enter on Twitter with the hashtag #nearmisssongs, or in the comments thread below, by February 17.
RESULTS OF COMPETITION No. 65, “BANDS FOR SNOWMAGEDDON,” in which you were asked to rename a performer or band in keeping with winter storm season.
HONORABLE MENTION TO:
Jefferson Airplane Grounded Due to Weather Conditions
Tom Petty and the Icebreakers
Ol’ Chilly Bastard
Alice in Snow Chains
Run Y’ Noses
Nat King Cold
Emerson, Lake Effect & Palmer
Bruce Springsteen and the E Sleet Band
Queens of the Ice Age
AND THE WINNER IS:
Derek Chauvin has been found guilty on all counts
Count 1: GUILTY
Count 2: GUILTY
Count 3: GUILTY
The jury has reached a verdict in the Chauvin trial
We will not know what the verdict is until then.
Mr. Chauvin has been charged with 2nd-degree murder, 3rd-degree murder and manslaughter in George Floyd’s death.
Things may be looking stable in America, but not so much worldwide
Spare a thought for the forgotten victim of the Trump presidency: Trump himself
I miss the most, helping people. That’s why I did it. Look, this has been very traumatic. I had a great life, great company, great business, no problems and now all I do is, people go after you. It’s vicious, it’s horrible but you know what? I loved doing it because I helped people. And I’ve helped them more than any president.
Former Democratic vice-president and ‘84 presidential candidate Walter Mondale has died