Today in Gossip: Old Gals Go BananasElizabeth Taylor does tequila shots at the Abbey? Liz Smith compares Cindy Adams and Barbara Walters to Lindsay Lohan and Miley Cyrus? Ian McKellen defaces Bibles? Shazam!
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The Fug Girls Pick the Worst of 2007Oscar bigwigs released this year’s crop of nominees Tuesday, but after the flop that was the Golden Globes (the opening night of awards season), it’s tempting to ignore Hollywood’s annual self-congratulation spree and embrace a good old-fashioned orgy of shame. That’s right, the Razzie Awards! They beat Oscar to the punch Monday, naming their choices for 2007’s very worst. As ever, the race for the Golden Raspberry is as tight as Burt Reynolds’s face. We can’t contain ourselves! So, we won’t: Read on for our exuberant choices as to who stank up the screen the most.
Worst Supporting Actor Nominees: Orlando Bloom, Kevin James, Eddie Murphy, Rob Schneider, Jon Voight.
Not to ruin his moment, but we dispute Orlando’s inclusion: He looked smoking hot in Yet More Pirates of the Caribbean, and that’s truly the most supportive an actor can be. Chuck & Larry’s problems go way beyond poor Kevin James, and, let’s face it, there’s no way Rob Schneider was any worse in that than he is in anything else. That leaves Jon Voight in Bratz (oy) and Eddie Murphy as Mr. Wong in Norbit, another of those parts he hogs because he’s a whore for latex makeup. But it’s Voight’s Razzie to lose, if only because seeing his name next to the word “bratz” makes us want to crawl back into the womb.
The Future of the Species Depends on Paris HiltonParis Hilton has landed a starring role in a movie set in the year 2056, “when a plague nearly destroys the human race and survival is dependent upon being able to finance a pricey organ transplant.” Anne Hathaway got into a fight with her boyfriend (who is being sued by Ron Burkle) during a screening of her movie in East Hampton, but she stayed with him at the after-party until the cops shut it down at 1 a.m. Madonna strolled into the Reebok Sports Club on Columbus Avenue without checking in. Tyra Banks and her family ate at Serendipity 3. The two assistants from Jane who were cast in SoapNet’s Fashionista Diaries have been moved to CosmoGirl. Usher’s pregnant girlfriend, whom he was slated to marry on Saturday until a last-minute cancellation, checked into a hospital for “pregnancy complications,” though it may just be a ploy to get him back. Ivana Trump is set to get married for a third time, to Rossano Rubicondi.
Allah’s Love We DeliverSome Palestinians claim that Yasser Arafat died of AIDS. Justin Timberlake had Lance Bass and his boyfriend run interference at the opening of his Southern Hospitality so that he could sneak out without running into Jessica Biel. Donald Trump and other captains of industry are fighting to keep the heliport in Hudson River Park open. Firefighters invited to the screening of Adam Sandler’s I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry took issue with Sandler’s financial support of Rudy Giuliani. Jonathan Ames is set to box with another writer. Moby got a surprisingly funny letter from Karl Rove. A.M. Homes is developing a show about the Hamptons for HBO.
Do Not Get in Diddy’s Way at the GrammysAt Rolling Stone’s pre-Grammy party, Diddy bumped Grey’s Anatomy cast members T.R. Knight, Kate Walsh, and Sara Ramirez from their spot in the VIP lounge; Britney exes Justin Timberlake and Kevin Federline hugged it out. Timberlake also partied so hard that he had to cancel a performance at Clive Davis’s party the next night. Singer Harry Connick Jr. says Anna Wintour is nothing like her character in The Devil Wears Prada. Also, Wintour-cinematically, a filmmaker working on a Vogue documentary lost footage of her at Bryant Park.