Hassling HasselbackRosie O’Donnell’s chief writer at The View was busted for drawing mustaches on pictures of arch-nemesis Elisabeth Hasselback. Accused D.C. Madam Deborah Jeane Palfrey wants to publicize more names from her client list, but ABC News says there are no other even remotely noteworthy names on it. David Blaine wants to jump off the Brooklyn Bridge. (Please!) Mary-Kate Olsen and Matthew Modine are set to join the cast of Weeds. The maps have been removed from Jodi’s Shortcuts, the semi-famous Hamptons traffic-avoidance routes. Callers trying to reach Sarah Silverman as part of an MTV Movie Awards promo have been accidentally dialing some company in Texas.
Worshipping Idols, BlandlyA new Idol has been crowned! Long live the Idol! Yes, folks, as we all know by now, Jordin Sparks won American Idol’s sixth season. Are you thrilled and excited? Yeah, us neither. As Caryn Ganz catalogues on Vulture, nearly everyone found last night’s finale a snooze. So what was there to talk about? Find out at Vulture.
‘American Idol’ Builds Up to a Rousing, Earth-Shattering Yawn! [Vulture]
Last night was the last performance show of the American Idol season, and naturally the country is on the edge of its collective seat to find out tonight whether Blake Lewis or Jordan Sparks is the winner. Last night’s theme, according the show’s producers, was the final countdown. But Vulture’s Caryn Ganz disagrees. She says the show was all about failure. How so? Find out at Vulture.
‘American Idol’ Celebrates the Losers [Vulture]
Billie Jean Is Not My Talk-Show HostBillie Jean King says she wouldn’t mind taking fellow lesbian Rosie O’Donnell’s spot on The View. Socialiterank.com will post no more, but its (still anonymous) founders do have a book deal. Arthur Sulzberger Jr. was marginally insensitive toward deaf people at the New York Times Co. annual meeting. American Idol contestants put on a private performance at Rupert Murdoch’s house. Christie’s exec John Hays made a quip about Katie Couric at the Children for Children benefit. Cameron Diaz went shopping in Soho, then freaked out when the paparazzi showed up. Kate Winslet likes New York’s paparazzi more than London’s. A woman obsessed with Sandra Bullock tried to run over Bullock’s husband with a car. Hugh Grant was arrested on an assault charge after throwing baked beans at a paparazzo.
Cautious CooperAnderson Cooper showers in his underwear at the gym to ward off camera-phone-wielding fans. Tyra Banks and Russell Simmons dined-and-dashed at the Brooklyn Diner. Robert De Niro may be mad at David Bowie because the rock star is kicking off his High Line Festival three days after Tribeca ends. (As New York’s Vulture reported yesterday.) LL Cool J may star in a revival of Cat on a Hot Tin Roof. Taki Theodoroacpulos won the U.S. National Judo Championship in 70-to-75 age bracket. In his upcoming tell-all, Michael Strahan compares playing pro football to being stabbed repeatedly. Former O.C. stars Adam Brody and Benjamin McKenzie witnessed a fight at Gold Bar. Susan Sarandon’s daughter, Eva Amuri, is pleased with her two sex scenes in Fred Durst’s directorial debut, The Education of Charlie Banks.
Why’d ‘Idol’ Reject Talk Back to Simon? The Bronx Made Him Do ItWe spotted “original New Yorker” Ian Benardo, the Bronx-born recent American Idol reject, at the Zac Posen after-party last night. Benardo made headlines for being super-rude and untalented — he was also rejected from So You Think You Can Dance — which naturally means he’ll soon be making lots of money and is already invited to all the right parties.
So what was Simon’s reaction to your remarks on Idol?
He said that I was the rudest person ever on the show, but the truth of the matter is, like, he’s always putting people down, and he shouldn’t come to New York if he’s not expecting someone to talk back. I’m sorry, he was very rude to me. And also I have a lot going for me! I’m a talented person. I’m the Idol correspondent for Extra now. And also I’ve been on Larry King.
Was there anything else that got edited out?
Simon said that I don’t look like an American Idol, and I told him that, with all his money, he has bigger breasts than Paula, and he should do something about it.
in other news
Rosie Turns Her Wrath on ‘Idol’ JudgesThe nice thing about covering Rosie O’Donnell’s feuds is that you’re rarely faced with a slow news day. Today, for example, brings news and uploads of her latest feud, this time against a formidable trinity: The judges of American Idol. As reported in the Posts both New York and Washington, Rosie said that Wednesday’s hugely watched Idol premiere — 32 million viewers is the estimate — contained elements of both drunkenness and cruelty: Paula stumbled around drinking what the View host doubted was Coke, and Simon mocked a contestant as looking like a “bush baby.” Missed the fun? To YouTube! First there’s this bit from Idol, in which Simon tosses off that insult and Paula does a fair amount of stumbling, if one can stumble in a chair. Then there’s the clip of Rosie criticizing Paula on The View. Take a look and judge for yourself. And then wonder how frustrated Barbara Walters must be that Rosie is always the audience’s pick.
Rosie’s New Target: American Idol [NYP]
Another Precinct Heard From: Rosie Weighs In on America’s Idol [WP]