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Awesome Things

  1. awesome things
    Ireland Votes to Legalize Same-Sex MarriageBy an overwhelming majority, Irish voters have made their country the first in history to achieve marriage equality through popular mandate.
    By Chas Danner
  2. awesome things
    A Young Mother’s Poem at the U.N. Climate Summit Was Completely HeartbreakingShe hails from the Marshall Islands.
    By Katie Zavadski
  3. Arty Germans Put White Flags on Brooklyn BridgeThey sound legit.
    By Joe Coscarelli
  4. awesome things
    Watch a Staten Island Kid in a ‘R.I.P. Eric Garner’ Shirt Dunk Over Cop CarThe NYPD finally figures out how to score some good press.
    By Joe Coscarelli
  5. awesome things
    You Can Now Unlock Your Cell Phone Without Breaking the LawThanks, Congress.
    By Katie Zavadski
  6. awesome things
    Citi Bike Now Being Used As SoulCycle for Homeless PeopleReally, really!
    By Joe Coscarelli
  7. fi-cri fallout
    Nicolas Sarkozy Has Had It With Jamie Dimon’s Mouth“There is an ocean between flexibility and the scandal we saw.”
    By Jessica Pressler
  8. real-life gossip girls
    Georgina Bloomberg Has the Last LaughPaging Joey Cheek.
    By Mike Vilensky
  9. white men with blackstones
    Steve Schwarzman Was a Notoriously Ostentatious Man for Halloween This YearThe Blackstone honcho showed off his stones.
    By Jessica Pressler
  10. sexual statuary
    Prince of Brunei: Please Don’t Talk About My Sex Sculptures of MyselfA foreign royal wants to bar discussion of certain personal artifacts from a financial trial.
    By Chris Rovzar
  11. the trials and tribulations of the sad panda
    Sad Panda Returns! (Sort Of)And not where you’d expect.
    By Alexandra Martell
  12. miracles
    Man Amazingly Cheerful After Spending Four Days Lying in a Swamp With a Broken Back“I’m so happy to see you guys!”
    By Jessica Pressler
  13. awesome things
    Syracuse Students Now Planning to Disrobe for Jamie DimonNow THIS should catch the JPMorgan CEO’s attention.
    By Jessica Pressler
  14. awesome things
    Someone Has Been Torturing Midwestern TV Stations by Pretending to Be a Yo-yo ChampionMeet Kenny “K-Strass” Strasser, who may be the love of our lives.
    By Edith Zimmerman
  15. awesome things
    A History of Obama Showing Real Interest in Awesome ThingsLike Mogwai. And Batarangs!
    By Chris Rovzar
  16. ink-stained wretches
    This Is What Happens If You Tell Matt Taibbi You Don’t Like His Work to His Face“Who are you? What have you ever written?”
    By Jessica Pressler
  17. awesome things
    If You Have Any Doubts About Rapper Birdman Getting Into the Oil Business, Take a Look at His HeadThe man has made a commitment.
    By Jessica Pressler
  18. awesome things
    Trader Caught Looking at Topless Pictures on Camera SuspendedThat’s fair.
    By Jessica Pressler
  19. ballsy crime
    Woman Who Glued Man’s Penis to His Stomach Admits She ‘Overreacted’Her bad.
    By Jessica Pressler
  20. in other news
    Ernie Anastos Wears an Earpiece at All TimesEven at dinner with his wife.
    By Jessica Pressler
  21. awesome things
    The New Annoying Wedding Trend: Save-the-Date VideosA couple has created a literally epic wedding announcement.
    By Jessica Pressler
  22. stupid crime of the day
    Robber Forgets to Put On Mask Until Halfway Through RobberySome people are just not detail-oriented.
    By Jessica Pressler
  23. awesome things
    Steve Cohen’s Ex-Wife Drops LawsuitWell, mission accomplished, anyway.
    By Jessica Pressler
  24. awesome things
    Teacher Sells Copies of His Own Book to StudentsWe know, this happens all the time. But this is a unique situation.
    By Jessica Pressler
  25. awesome things
    It Really Is a Wonderful LifeAnd we’re glad that Richard Simmons is in it.
    By Jessica Pressler
  26. awesome things
    Jack Beers, 94-Year-Old StrongmanA former vaudeville performer rips a phone book into thirds with his bare hands.
    By Jessica Pressler
  27. awesome things
    Judge Tells ‘Vexatious’ Bank to Shove ItA verbose judge relieves a Long Island couple of their $525,000 mortgage.
    By Jessica Pressler
  28. goldman sacks is more like it
    Goldman Sachs, Newly Mindful of Optics“We don’t club baby seals. We club babies.”
    By Jessica Pressler
  29. the trials and tribulations of the sad panda
    Call Off the Hounds: Sad Panda Is BackAfter a long absence, the ponderous plushie is back in our lives.
    By Jessica Pressler
  30. scenes from a meltdown
    BBC’s Lehman Brothers Movie Actually Sounds Pretty AwesomeThe British dramatization of the collapse of Lehman Brothers may not be as poncey as we feared.
    By Jessica Pressler
  31. white men with deep mediterranean tans
    AIG CEO ‘Regrets’ Threatening to Purple-Nurple Andrew CuomoAIG CEO Robert Benmosche reportedly “regrets his comments regarding Mr. Cuomo and the tone of those comments.”
    By Jessica Pressler
  32. goldmanfellas
    ‘Didn’t I Tell You Not to Buy Anything, Not to Attract Attention?’Goldman Sachs directs employees not to make any big purchases.
    By Jessica Pressler
  33. awesome things
    Minnesota Couple Gets Married, FamousWhy? Because their wedding video is the best thing ever.
    By Jessica Pressler
  34. ballsy crime
    Danny Pang Believes Himself to Be InnocentAll he did was make some administrative assistants happy.
    By Jessica Pressler
  35. the greatest depression
    The Treasury Department Needs Someone to Teach Them How to Laugh AgainOut of work? Able to make public debt hilarious? The Treasury has a job for you!
    By Jessica Pressler
  36. the rich hunt
    Ad Rallies Rage At Bankers, But Who’s Behind It?Scottish and Newcastle’s new viral ad makes fun of bankers, but the joke’s on us.
    By Jessica Pressler
  37. whither gop?
    Mark Sanford Has the Soul of a PoetA linguistics professor finds the governor’s public statements contain some impressive literary allusions.
    By Jessica Pressler
  38. great moments in journalism
    Honduras President Manuel Zelaya Was Underdressed for a CoupTo be fair, it’s hard to decide what to wear to these things.
    By Jessica Pressler
  39. early and awesome
    A History of Embarrassing Presidential PhotosIt’s inspired.
    By Jessica Pressler
  40. the most important people in the world
    Gwyneth Paltrow Just Loves Katie Lee Joel and Her Husband, ‘William’In the latest installment of her newsletter, Goop, Gwyneth reveals that she recently made the acquaintance of a wonderful couple.
    By Jessica Pressler
  41. awesome things
    White-collar Criminals Are Pansies, Says Dog the Bounty Hunter “A criminal’s life has nothing but ups and downs, whereas a white-collar criminal has never seen the dark side, so when he enters that realm, he is lost.”
    By Jessica Pressler
  42. early and awesome
    Chinese College Kids Snicker When Geithner Talks About Their ‘Assets’Hee, hee.
    By Jessica Pressler
  43. awesome things
    Chace Crawford’s Footloose Won’t Include the Legendary Warehouse Gymnastics SceneThis is a problem.
    By Chris Rovzar
  44. april fools’ day
    Outrage! AIG Executives on Another Retreat!Sharpen your pitchforks, populace: We’re going to Stockbridge, Massachusetts.
    By Jessica Pressler