Stevie Cohen Could End Up in a PickleNo, not in the Damian Hirst sense, though that would be amazing: The art-loving SAC Capital Management CEO could have some problems with the SEC if he’s not careful. Plus! An ex–Bear CEO jumps ship at JPMorgan, Natalie Portman’s apartment goes on the block, and Condé Nast has a green issue, in our daily rundown of industry news.
Tabloids Will Reportedly Pay $12 Million for Pictures of Brangelina TwinsThat’s a whole $8 million more than the couple got for Shiloh! Is it because there’s two of them or because of inflation? Plus: Citigroup’s seven-point plan for saving itself, the Palazzo Chupi triplex goes on sale, and other things that make you go hmmm, in our daily roundup of media, finance, real-estate and law news.
Cindy Adams Had Her Psychic Write Her Column TodayCindy Adam’s psychic, Wendy, predicts that in 2008, the mortgage crisis will stabilize, Brad and Angelina will adopt some more kids, and Madonna will shave her head. Box owner Simon Hammerstein wrote an e-mail to his club’s manager privately applauding a dancer who spilled a drink on Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore (“Bleep] Ashton and Demi, they are so up their own arses … and they spend nothing”) but insisted that publicly the performer be “reamed.”
in other news
Loss of Maddox Cracks Richard Johnson’s Heart of StoneWe’re not ashamed to admit it: When we saw those pictures of Angelina Jolie filming The Changeling in Los Angeles the other day, our hearts dropped to the floor. It was like discovering someone’s been cheating on you. What was she doing in L.A.? She’s supposed to be here! First, there was denial. They can’t really be gone, we said to ourselves. They only just got here! Then came the story in the New York Observer about Maddox leaving school, and slowly, grim reality set in. We e-mailed Cindy Guargenti, Brad’s rep, just to be sure. “I think hes left … not sure,” came the BlackBerry-ed response. “I believe they are on their way back to la shortly.” Fuck!, we said to ourselves. Even she doesn’t know where he’s going? And why should she! They’ve had like ten houses in ten months! Why do these people move around so much? Why do they “phunk” with our hearts? We thought we were alone in our sadness, and so we buried our feelings in shame. But today, we saw that we are not alone. In an unusually sensitive item, today’s “Page Six” ruminates about how terrible all of this moving must be for the children, particularly Maddox, who switches schools every few weeks. In fact, “Page Six” hurt so much, they went to a therapist. “With the moves, the kids just don’t invest in relationships, because they’re going to lose them anyway,” therapist Puja Hall told the Post. “They think: ‘Why bother? I’m not gonna stick around. We’re gonna pick up and go, and the loss of friends is painful.’” Indeed. Don’t worry, Richard Johnson. We’ll get through this! Together.
Bum Trip for Brangelina Kids [NYP]
Previously: Intel’s coverage of Maddox Jolie
Aasif Mandvi Can Hear the Celebrities SingingLast night at the Hugo Boss’s “Boss Black” fashion show at the Cunar building, publicists and velvet ropes held us back from super-famous celebrities like Julianne Moore and Kate Winslet. “We’re actually on our way out,” said Kristin Davis’s publicist when we tried to corner her for more SATC spoilers. “My feet are screaming at me,” she said apologetically. “They need to be amputated.” Okay, ew. Moving on. Speaking of giant celebrities, what does Daily Show correspondent Aasif Mandvi think about tabloid stars like Lindsay Lohan and possibly Jennifer Aniston moving to New York? “I think they’re coming here because it makes them look smarter,” he said. But, we said, having so much star wattage might change the city, no? Mandvi agreed. “I think there’s going to be like a hum in the air. It’s going to be like a choir that hangs over the city at all times. Aaaa aaaaa aaaaa aaaaa wherever they go. It could get annoying after a while.” We suppose it could. So, did Mandvi ever meet Brangelina? Because we figure all famous and famous-ish people must know each other, if only tangentially. And we were right sort of. “I’ve met them,” he nodded. “They’re really nice. They’re just normal people.” Really? How did he meet them? “Well,” he said. “I was walking and they were talking to reporters and I walked past them.” He looked at us expectantly. Wait: That’s it? How did he know they were normal? “They were talking to reporters, just like everybody else.” —Amy Odell
Get advice on women’s underwear from Ne-Yo and pain-relief tips from Kristin Davis at our complete coverage of the Boss Black spring/summer 2008 collection.