Jake Gyllenhaal Once Peed on Someone’s LegThe actor shares his tried-and-true method for how to cure a jellyfish sting. Plus, a Stroke moves to Brooklyn, and Samantha Ronson and Lindsay Lohan continue to move among various restaurants, in today’s gossip roundup.
Robert De Niro Pulls Out the Big Guns Against Art GalleryRobert De Niro sued an Upper East Side art gallery that gave twelve of his father’s paintings to a gallery in Rome as part of a debt-payment arrangement. Jason Binn had another kid. NBA commish David Stern, Derek Jeter, and Donald Trump showed up at the wedding of Ahmad Rashad and Sale Johnson, but estranged daughter Casey Johnson did not. Chris Noth and Steve Walter are thinking of moving their jazz club Cutting Room to Hell’s Kitchen. Ashlee Simpson begged photographers not to take her picture when she was smoking outside Angels and Kings. Theodore Sorensen, the lawyer who wrote JFK’s famous “Ask Not…” inaugural address, just bought at $10.75 million condo at 15 Central Park West.
Mr. Big Almost Gets Beat UpChris Noth was accosted by an angry trucker in the Bronx who wanted to know when he was going to marry Carrie. People were afraid to talk to Javier Bardem at the New York premiere of No Country for Old Men because he was so crazy in the movie. Dr. Ruth gave a copy of Sex for Dummies to Ivana Trump and fiancé Rossano Rubicondi while eating lunch at Michael’s. Anna Wintour had a meeting yesterday with Mayor Bloomberg. Ethan Hawke wowed the crowd at Off Broadway play Jump by breaking out a Karate Kid kick during an audience-participation bit. Zac Posen’s mom claims that her son can remember every outfit he’s worn to every party over the past 27 years.
Judd Apatow Gets the Last LaughRight before Undeclared was canceled in 2002, creator Judd Apatow sent a Fox executive a note saying, “I don’t understand how you can [bleep] me in the [bleep] when your [bleep] is still in me from last time.” Christian media-watchdog group Renaissance complained that the female anchors on Fox News wear really short skirts. While taping 30 Rock recently, Tracy Morgan didn’t know his lines, didn’t listen to the director, and got into arguments with cast members on set. Stifler from American Pie and Pedro from Napoleon Dynamite sent out an invitation for their joint birthday party at Room Service to a bunch of modeling agencies. Famed British chef Fergus Henderson is cooking at the Spotted Pig tomorrow. Penélope Cruz and new man Javier Bardem acted “touchy-feely” at the New York Film Festival.
Chris Noth Doesn’t Heart ‘New York’At last night’s opening of Mauritius at the Biltmore Theater, Patricia Clarkson confessed a secret. “I never throw away a New Yorker,” she told New York. “I have New Yorkers dating back to the 1980s. I have boxes and boxes.” That sounds so, um, normal, actually. “She does. I know this,” said Chris Noth, passing by. “Not New York Magazine.” Noth also had some harsh words about our recent Bill Clinton–as–First Lady cover. “Your magazine has absolutely no scruples,” he said. “That’s terrible!” You know what else we’re terrible at, according to Noth? Predicting the plot of the Sex and the City movie based on all of the shooting around town. “Have you seen the script?” he asked. “I have. There’s been all this talk of Big and Carrie get married. I’m not going to say yes, or no, but did you see me at the church with Sarah Jessica? No, because I was at the Brooklyn Detention Center shooting Law & Order: Criminal Intent. The pictures everyone’s talking about are me with Charlotte. What does that mean? All I can say is that you people have gotten nothing right.” This makes us feel a lot better about the fact that we never watch Criminal Intent. —Jada Yuan
Derek Jeter Hearts Gabrielle UnionSex and the City spoiler alert! Carrie Bradshaw and Mr. Big tie the knot at St. Patrick’s Cathedral. Cameron Diaz and new fling Bradley Cooper spent a romantic weekend going to the SNL after-party at Primehouse and hanging out on the sideline of the Giants game. Denise Rich is throwing a party aboard her yacht in New York Harbor for those who donated to her cancer foundation. Richard Prince sent a sincere thank-you note to ArtNet.com after the site’s critic panned his Guggenheim show. Derek Jeter’s current flame is Gabrielle Union. David Blaine tried to hypnotize some exotic dancers at Tens. Kelly Ripa ate on the Upper West Side without makeup. James Gandolfini honked at Secret Service near the Four Seasons in his Mercedes.
Breaking: Lohans Not Best ParentsLindsay Lohan’s bodyguard claims Dina and Michael weren’t the best parents. Maria Bartiromo pissed off PETA by posing in a Michael Kors coat with fox-fur cuffs. The Box smelled like burnt hair for two hours after a patron’s hair caught on fire. Jay McCarroll’s friend says he has an Upper West Side apartment, contrary to what the designer told New York. Katie Couric belted out “Sweet Caroline” at a piano bar in Nantucket. Harvey Weinstein picked Clint Eastwood to compose the score for John Cusack’s new movie. City comptroller Bill Thompson says he was able to buy an apartment in Brooklyn shortly after graduating college in 1974, but his daughter couldn’t even afford to rent one. Chris Noth will be in the Sex and the City movie.
Enquiring Minds Want CashThe wife and son of deceased National Enquirer founder Generoso Pope Jr. are suing each other for the remainder of his $418 million fortune. Barbaro was the focus groups’ choice for August’s Vanity Fair cover, but Graydon Carter nixed him for Shia LaBeouf. CNBC’s Maria Bartiromo will soon have her own show titled Money Honey. The Giulianis like golf, bargains, The Tudors. Chris Noth tried to poach talent for his club from Hawaiian Tropic Zone but failed. Tinsley Mortimer and Lydia Hearst are attending a dinner thrown by Pete Wentz in the Hamptons. Jon Anderson of Yes canceled a benefit show for a bunch of kids because his spiritual adviser told him to.
Theater on the Radio
Eric Bogosian’s Talk Radio is about a controversial and caustic radio host who’s forced to confront the hatred he’s engendered just as he’s about to get picked up for national syndication. A Broadway revival starring Liev Schreiber opened Sunday night, and the after-party seemed a good place to conduct an informal survey of actors’ listening habits. We learned that Chris Noth won’t listen to radio anymore, Stephanie March wants to be a customer-service avenger, and Bogosian only listens to classical. There’s a lot more, all after the jump.