A-Rod Has ‘the Heart of a Poet’He’s been writing Madonna love notes. Also gross: Raffaello Follieri is tormented by rat poop in prison, and Artie Lange spanked it eavesdropping on Christina Applegate. All in the gossip roundup!
Jimmy Kimmel’s ‘I’m F—ing Ben Affleck’ Confirms Our Celebrity Suspicions
You know how you kind of wonder whether celebrities are all friends with one another? Like, do they all go to each other’s houses in Los Angeles and play parlor games on Saturday nights? Has Natalie Portman, for example, ever had to do Benicio Del Toro during the charades portion of Celebrity — which required her to point at her friend Scarlett Johansson sitting on the couch and then do a pantomime of having sex in an elevator? Well, we’ve always imagined life in La La Land to be like that. You know, like everyone has sort of all slept together and given one another weird, unfunny nicknames. And sometimes there are moments in pop culture that confirm our suspicions. This weekend had one of them, and it wasn’t the Oscars. No, the biggest clue that being famous is like being on the indoor-track team in high school was actually Jimmy Kimmel’s brilliant musical debut, “I’m Fucking Ben Affleck.” It was, of course, a follow-up to Sarah Silverman’s “I’m Fucking Matt Damon,” and although the musical caliber is a lot lower, the self-loving celebrity rate is off the charts. Click above to enjoy. It’s like Ocean’s Twelve, but watchable.
in other news
Paula Zahn and Richard Cohen Start Fighting Dirty
Ex-CNN anchor Paula Zahn kept a “quite lurid” diary that outlined her secret extra-marital affair with CitiGroup CEO Paul Fribourg, reports “Rush & Molloy.” You remember diaries? The things people used before there were blogs? Well, turns out her husband, Richard Cohen, found the book, which is bad, and then read it to at least one of their kids, which is, you know, worse. This comes on the heels of a lawsuit Zahn filed against Cohen demanding a close examination of the way he invested her money during their marriage. “Friends” of both are blabbing all the tawdry details to the gossip column, trying to make each side look victimized — and boy are these “friends” experts! The pals know what the diary says, what each side is planning in the divorce, how Cohen managed Zahn’s money, and exactly what the anchor was worth when they originally got hitched. Hey wait a minute. If we didn’t know better, we’d say that Zahn and Cohen both had a hand in this item! But that’s crazy talk — they’d never put their children through anything so embarrassing.
Zahn Spells Out Her Tryst? [NYDN]