The Fug Girls Question Lindsay Lohan’s Magic 8 BallSure, we’ve all heard that Lindsay Lohan was allegedly hoovering enough blow to kill a horse, but seeing it in black and white (thanks to Brit paper the News of the World) is another matter. Now, the once-charming Lohan seems poised to torch her remaining potential and snort its ashes off a toilet seat. If those who don’t learn history are doomed to repeat it, then Lindsay, get studying: The outlook is bleak, based on what’s come before you. Here are five possible career arcs, and our bets on which Lohan will follow.
1. The Enabled Addict Lohan’s coke tape plays like a sequel to the Great Kate Moss Scandal of 2005. If the parallels continue, she’ll spend about a month feigning remorse until people recommence ignoring her problems, then she’ll begin a gross on-off relationship with a drugged-out loser while her looks fade.
It’s All Downhill From Morningside HeightsBoerum Hill: It’s not enough that the Brooklyn House of Detention could reopen. Besides room for 720 inmates, look for two towers with residential or commercial space. [Brooklyn Daily Eagle via mcbrooklyn]
Clinton Hill: Residents of the area’s southern flank, rejoice … a bank (a North Fork) is finally coming to Fulton and Clinton! [Brooklyn Record]
Greenpoint: Residents come together to complain to a building inspector about excessive noise and damage caused by construction at 110 Green Street. [Newyorkshitty]
Harlem: The Beaumont, a 63-unit Art Deco apartment building on Riverside Drive, has been sold for just over $20 million. [Uptown Flavor]
Morningside Heights: This area has the greatest number of bike commuters — after Park Slope, of course. [Streetsblog]
Park Slope: A local brothel is undergoing a renovation. But what will the building be now? [Curbed]
One of These Things Is Not Like the OthersThe curmudgeonly Copyranter noticed this ad for the NYU Child Study Center posted on the Upper West Side. “Social phobia is intense shyness and pathological self-consciousness,” reads the explanatory text. (Click here for a larger, readable version.) Indeed. It is hard to be a black kid in the land o’ Zabar’s.
It IS Hard For Black Kids to Fit in on the Upper West Side [Copyranter]
show and talk
Video: ‘Poiret: King of Fashion’ at the Met
A special exhibit of clothing by self-crowned “King of Fashion” Paul Poiret just opened at the Met, and our cameras took a tour. In the early twentieth-century, the Frenchman liberated women from the corset, introduced a vivid color palette, and was the first designer to socialize with his clients. His “naïve and spontaneous” approach continues today through designers like Proenza Schouler, says Andrew Bolton, associate curator of the Costume Institute. “Poiret believed that women should dress in the way that suited them most, not just following trends.”
Poiret: King of Fashion Video [NYM]
in other news
Rupert Goes Green — Except for That Whole Using-Tons-of-Paper Thing
Maybe John Kerry’s right, and environmentalism truly isn’t a partisan issue anymore. How else to explain the latest passenger on the bandwagon, Rupert Murdoch, who has just promised to take his News Corporation carbon-neutral within four years? An ultracheery news item — in the Post, of course — breaks down the massive undertaking into smaller initiatives. For instance, the 20th Century Fox lot will switch to solar-powered golf carts. The 24 crew will use biodiesel-powered generators for outdoor scenes. (That must well complement the show’s commitment to recycling: How many times has Jack gone rogue? CTU been invaded? Vice-president conspired?) Apparently this should go a long way toward negating the 641,150 tons of carbon News Corp. belched out in 2006 alone. But environmentally friendly explosions aside, we can’t help but notice one little problem.
Man the Buckets! Long Term Capital Is (Sort Of) Back!FINANCE
• Some of Long Term Capital’s former executives are making another go of it with a new fund, Quantitative Alternatives. [Bloomberg via DealBook/NYT]
• Morgan Stanley will pay $8 million to settle federal fraud charges over its alleged failure to get the best prices possible for retail stock investors. [AP via NYT]
• The SEC will announce Monday whether it will appeal a court ruling that overturns the “Merrill Lynch” rule, allowing brokers to offer fee-based services to clients without being registered as financial advisers. [NYP]
A Tubbs-and-Crockette Can Actually Pull Off a Boxy BlazerYour guide to the species of the nightlife habitat.
Etymology: Specimens rock the Miami Vice look — and, remarkably, get away with it.
Distinguishing characteristics: Though males are more often sighted than females, the rare female Tubbs-and-Crockette is occasionally spotted with its telltale plumage: pastels and an oversize blazer. Though men in such attire rarely achieve the look they want (fierce, drug-lord busting, gun-toting hotness), women are more successful. Notice the white pants, the pale pink button-up, and the boxy fit of the jacket. The specimen in the photo, however, suffers from one mutation: Her lack of loafers worn without socks.
Known locales: Running along the waterfront, looking for drug boats; the Diner
How to approach: Fierce creatures, Tubbs-and-Crockettes are terrifying to behold. Tread lightly — they could be packing. But after sending over a cocktail or three, you’ll get off with a smirk. If you ask nicely enough, she may even frisk you.
Endangerment status: Fragile. In the immortal words of their leader, Sonny Crockett: “You want to be dead? Bang, you’re dead.” —Amina Akhtar
in other news
The Media Primary: Bloomberg ‘08It might still be up in the air between Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama. Republicans might all be holding their breath for the inevitable explosion of the Rudy bubble and the subsequent inflation of — who? McCain? Romney? — a successor. But one primary has solidified in the last few days: Media moguls are backing Mike Bloomberg for president.