The Fug Girls Pick the Worst of 2007Oscar bigwigs released this year’s crop of nominees Tuesday, but after the flop that was the Golden Globes (the opening night of awards season), it’s tempting to ignore Hollywood’s annual self-congratulation spree and embrace a good old-fashioned orgy of shame. That’s right, the Razzie Awards! They beat Oscar to the punch Monday, naming their choices for 2007’s very worst. As ever, the race for the Golden Raspberry is as tight as Burt Reynolds’s face. We can’t contain ourselves! So, we won’t: Read on for our exuberant choices as to who stank up the screen the most.
Worst Supporting Actor Nominees: Orlando Bloom, Kevin James, Eddie Murphy, Rob Schneider, Jon Voight.
Not to ruin his moment, but we dispute Orlando’s inclusion: He looked smoking hot in Yet More Pirates of the Caribbean, and that’s truly the most supportive an actor can be. Chuck & Larry’s problems go way beyond poor Kevin James, and, let’s face it, there’s no way Rob Schneider was any worse in that than he is in anything else. That leaves Jon Voight in Bratz (oy) and Eddie Murphy as Mr. Wong in Norbit, another of those parts he hogs because he’s a whore for latex makeup. But it’s Voight’s Razzie to lose, if only because seeing his name next to the word “bratz” makes us want to crawl back into the womb.
Oh, Poor Fashion WeekFewer Hollywood stars than usual are expected at Fashion Week when it starts September 5, because the Emmys and the MTV Video Music Awards are the same week. Dan Rather was confused by the “Thriller” dance stunt performed by Katie Couric’s staff last week, though he thinks her job is safe. Arianna Huffington may be dating Newark mayor Cory Booker. Cuba Gooding Jr., who is married with three kids, recently made out with five girls in one night at Tenjune. Jeremy Piven got into a heated argument with his mother at Nobu Malibu, though it’s unclear about what. Gwyneth Paltrow has been trekking around Spain with Mario Batali for a PBS cooking show (and hubby Chris Martin almost didn’t get into the premiere of her brother’s new movie). Cameron Diaz had a romantic dinner with John Mayer at Mai House in Tribeca. Residents of Martha’s Vineyard are happy that Larry David and Laurie are broken up and that Larry is dating again.
The Return of Peter Gatien?Deported former Limelight owner Peter Gatien might be coming back to the States because he is part Native American. CBS Evening News executive producer Rick Kaplan orchestrated an office dance-off to boost morale. Jewish boxer Dmitriy “Star of David” Salita, from Brooklyn, had his fight at Cipriani Downtown rescheduled because it fell on the Sabbath. Paris Hilton’s crisis PR guy, Mike Sitrick, is the reason she’s been out of the tabs lately, but friends say she can’t keep up the act. Robin Williams went to an AA meeting in Greenwich. Cuba Gooding Jr. and Isiah Thomas hung out at Socialista.
Barron Hilton Was Not MuggedSecurity guards from Stereo thwarted a mugging of Paris Hilton’s brother, Barron Hilton. (And Barbara Walters will get Paris’s first post-prison interview.) Biographies of Dina Lohan state that she was a Rockette and Broadway actress, but she is neither. Porn star Savanna Samson backs Giuliani for president. Anna Quindlen is auctioning off naming rights to a character in her upcoming novel. Former Cosby Show star Phylicia Rashad often does not show up to parties she’s expected at. Bruce Willis was angry that Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore were dating until Will Smith gave him a talking-to. Bebe Neuwirth went to a chiropractor.