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Emperor’s Club

  1. intel
    Predict Which Pun the ‘Post’ Will Choose for Tomorrow’s Spitzer Cover! Obviously, our wit will never match the staggering genius of the minds behind New York Post headlines. But, as we wait for some, any new information to emerge in the Eliot Spitzer prostitution scandal, we can’t help but fall into that age-old game: Guess What the Post Is Gonna Say Tomorrow! If the governor resigns tonight, there’s a chance the coverage will have moved on to something about the new African-American (and legally blind) governor, David Paterson. But in all likelihood, no matter what happens, there will be a completely spectacular and vicious pun on the cover, along with a terribly unflattering picture of Spitzer. Below, we’ve come up with our best guesses — and we admit, they’re not that good. In the comments, please help us out with your best pun stylings: NAILED SCREWED SPENT RING STING HOOK, LINE & SPITZER STEAMROLLED BLOWING OFF STEAM LOVE POTION #9 A NIGHT AT THE SPITZ AN EL’ OF A GOOD TIME SPITZER SWALLOWS Update: Our friend Jeff over at Portfolio has a pretty good one: “LOVE GOV” Update: And the Post went with… HO NO! We congratulate them for finding something that none of you come up with. Thanks for all your suggestions — we think our favorite was LOVE GUV DOESN’T LIKE TO WEAR “GLOVE” by “Creativeunderclass.”
  2. it just happened
    Report: Governor Spitzer Involved With ‘Prostitution Ring’The Times is reporting that Governor Eliot Spitzer has just admitted to his senior staff that he has been involved in a “prostitution ring.” No more details have been released, but he is set to make an announcement momentarily. Stay tuned! Spitzer is Linked to Prostitution Ring [NYT] Related: You Can Say This About the Girls of the Emperor’s Club: They’re No Morons Update: Just to catch you up, yes, this is the same Eliot Spitzer who as New York attorney general prosecuted at least two prostitution rings. And yup, he’s the one who has a wife and three children, too. Update 2: The Times mentioned the recent bust-up of the Emperor’s Club prostitution ring. No word yet whether it is the group in question, but since they are being investigated right now, it’s a likely candidate. The Times connects Spitzer to an Emperor’s Club liaison the day before Valentine’s Day. The unnamed John in question, who may have been Spitzer, was Client #9. Update 3: In what is probably an awkwardly coincidental typo, the New York State Website now lists David Paterson as governor. [Ed note: Though we can no longer log onto the state Website, we’re told by others that it’s now back to normal.] Update 4: According to GoDaddy.com, the domain names www.clientnumber9.com and www.clientnumbernine.com have already been purchased today. Man, the Internet is fast.
  3. in other news
    You Can Say This About the Girls of the Emperor’s Club: They’re No MoronsYesterday the Feds busted the Emperor’s Club, a New York–based escort service that provided, according to their Website, “refined and successful international clients” looking for “risk-free dating … without long-term-commitment intricacies” with “exclusive, beautiful, educated companions of fine family and career backgrounds.” You know, hookers. Of the four people charged with running the service, three of them were women. Still, from the phone records in the FBI affidavit, parts of which are up on the Smoking Gun, it didn’t seem like it was a woman-friendly workplace, from the male founder who said that a would-be call girl “looks like a butcher in my opinion” to the conversation about the “baggage” a worker with kids has to the outraged indignation of an applicant who was “shock and confuse” that the company expected its employees to have sex with men who don’t even take them out to dinner. But then comes a tender moment between one self-aware prostie and her pimpette.