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  1. the top line
    What Morgan Stanley Is Getting by Buying E-TradeThe lesson here for retail-brokerage clients is to figure out whether they are keeping too much money in cash.
  2. the most important people in the world
    Lindsay Lohan Resembles That Drunk Baby Very Much!Lindsay Lohan is suing E-Trade in dramatic violation of the legendary small penis rule.
  3. things that are awesome
    We’re Sorry, But E*TRADE’s Baby Ads Are HilariousMike and the Mechanics + talking babies.