Celebrities Are Behaving Erratically at PartiesHayden Panettiere dirty danced with guys while her mom sipped screwdrivers and watched over her at an Old Navy party. Prince refused to walk into the 50th birthday party of his buddy Benny Medina until Medina agreed to come out and personally walk him in. Kristen Dunst’s “erratic” behavior has friends thinking she may or may not be “on the verge of a breakdown.”
Alan Cumming, ReporterWe know Alan Cumming has had sex with journalists. But would he ever like to try being a journalist, like Naomi Campbell, who recently interviewed Hugo Chavez for British GQ? “I’d love to ask certain questions to Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama,” he said at the launch of the Italian Commission’s Made in Italy ad campaign at the Hearst tower. “I’d like to know where they stand on equal rights for gay people. I’d also like to interview George Bush, just to watch him squirm.” (Maybe he could ask him, “You’re into your cock, aren’t you?”) But what about the people who really matter?, we pressed. Which celebrities would he like to interview? “I’d like to find out who all those blonde girls are — there’s a whole lot of them who look the same, the ones from The Hills, and that Hayden, um, Pan-i-tare? She’s everywhere,” he said. “And who’s that one, that Kim Ka-shi-shen?” Kardashian? We said. The one who made a sex tape with Brandy’s brother and now has a TV show? “Yes! My friend told me she’s a skanky whore, and I’m like, ‘Wow, she’s a lot more interesting than I thought she was.’” Like any ambitious reporter, Cumming would like to land the big story. “I’d love to interview Britney,” he said wistfully. Then he changed his mind. “But I’d rather her do it with one of those E! TV people, or Oprah.” That’s it, Alan Cumming will take care of Hillary and Barack. Let the professionals handle Britney. —Amy Preiser
Jessica Simpson Has the Same Crummy Friends As the Rest of UsJessica Simpson got totally pissed at Eva Longoria for hanging out with her ex John Mayer at GoldBar. MSNBC pundit Lawrence O’Donnell, who plays a lawyer on Big Love, bashed Mormonism on The McLaughlin Group on Sunday. Richard Belzer says he’s “hurt” his role on Law & Order: SVU has been cut back. PETA has dubbed the Olsen twins the “Trollsen Twins” because of their affinity for fur. Among the items in J.Lo’s gift registry for her twins are a Balmoral enameled black carriage for a $3,495 and a $289 suede play mat.
Judith Regan Says Murdoch’s Wife Smacks Him AroundA diner at the Waverly Inn overheard Judith Regan claiming that Rupert Murdoch is regularly hit by wife Wendi. Marilyn Manson may or may not have been asking for coke and Adderall in the bathroom of Bette last week. Helena Christensen’s 7-year-old son, Mingus, is a chess genius. Howard Stern thinks Beth Ostrosky has invited too many people to their wedding. Lance Armstrong chatted with Blackstone’s Pete Peterson at the Four Seasons. Cindy Adams claims that Colin Powell told friends that he sympathizes with General Petraeus but that he’s “digging his own foxhole” (or some approximation thereof).
new york fugging city
Five Simple Rules for Being a Successful Teenage CelebrityHeroes star Hayden Panettiere celebrated her 18th birthday Tuesday, capping a week of paparazzi obsessively capturing her every step, likely in hopes that they’ll nab yet another child actress in the throes of coming-of-age hedonism. But thus far Hayden has bucked the trend, managing to keep out of rehab and in the squeaky-clean spotlight. To help her stay on this very right track, we suggest Hayden learn from the varied fates of those who came before her.
Paps No Match for Moms at ‘Rocket Science’ PremiereThe Regal Union Square Cinemas were taken over last night by the star-sprinkled premiere of Rocket Science, the high-school-debate-team comedy which features a gaggle of comely twentysomethings. For once the paparazzi were outflashed and outshouted — by the scrum of stage parents roped off on the other side of the red carpet. “The first time I ever did a play — my parents over here will remember this — I forgot all of my lines and started bawling,” explained actor Nick D’Agosto, winking at his adoring mother. D’Agosto is currently filming scenes opposite Hayden Panettiere for the fall season of Heroes. He plays her superpowered boyfriend, and omg! They get to kiss! “I have a girlfriend, but it was great. It is wonderful,” he said. “So, I’m going to play that down.” Oops, too late for that. —Brett Amelkin
Bonus Party Lines: More photos and quotes from the Rocket Science premiere.
new york fugging city
The Fug Girls Crown the Next ‘It’ Party Girl
With Paris Hilton summering in the slammer and Lindsay Lohan going cold turkey (again), America’s paparazzi, bartenders, and boy toys can breathe a sigh of relief. But it’ll be brief: With the tabloids’ two most popular subjects locked away, there’s a gaping hole atop the celebustarlet hierarchy, and Hollywood, like nature, abhors a vacuum. Who’s most likely to seize the “It” Party Girl crown?
Lohan, Larter Go Shopping for Free
This is Upfronts Week, the time of year when Hollywood TV stars must come to New York to schmooze with the advertisers who pay the bills. In exchange, the actors get a warm feeling of job security, and the chance to return to their hotels with mountains of swag courtesy of Lucky magazine’s annual “Lucky Club” Upfronts gifting suite at the Ritz Carlton.