Jimmy Kimmel’s ‘I’m F—ing Ben Affleck’ Confirms Our Celebrity Suspicions
You know how you kind of wonder whether celebrities are all friends with one another? Like, do they all go to each other’s houses in Los Angeles and play parlor games on Saturday nights? Has Natalie Portman, for example, ever had to do Benicio Del Toro during the charades portion of Celebrity — which required her to point at her friend Scarlett Johansson sitting on the couch and then do a pantomime of having sex in an elevator? Well, we’ve always imagined life in La La Land to be like that. You know, like everyone has sort of all slept together and given one another weird, unfunny nicknames. And sometimes there are moments in pop culture that confirm our suspicions. This weekend had one of them, and it wasn’t the Oscars. No, the biggest clue that being famous is like being on the indoor-track team in high school was actually Jimmy Kimmel’s brilliant musical debut, “I’m Fucking Ben Affleck.” It was, of course, a follow-up to Sarah Silverman’s “I’m Fucking Matt Damon,” and although the musical caliber is a lot lower, the self-loving celebrity rate is off the charts. Click above to enjoy. It’s like Ocean’s Twelve, but watchable.
Celine Dion Is F—ing With the Cast of ‘Spring Awakening’The cast of Spring Awakening likes watching the parody video “Celine Dion Is Fucking Amazing” before taking the stage. Jamie Johnson’s The One Percent, the second movie he’s made about rich Upper East Siders, premieres tonight. Alice + Olive designer Stacey Bendet got engaged to Eric Eisner, son of former Disney chief Michael Eisner. Entertainment Weekly canceled its annual Oscar-night viewing party at Elaine’s. Mary-Kate Olsen hung out with pals at old standby the Bowery Hotel on Friday.
‘Journal’ Takes Beef with Mariane Pearl PublicMariane Pearl, the widow of murdered Wall Street Journal writer Daniel Pearl, and the Journal are no longer on friendly terms. Naomi Campbell told a crowd at a dinner for the Black Action Retail Group that she was done with throwing cellphones. (Her visit to Hugo Chavez also garnered praise from terrorist groups.) Former Giant Tiki Barber will attend the book party of NFL Network host Rich Eisen tonight at the Time Warner Center. Tyra Banks made out with a “gorgeous model type” at Thor in Hotel Rivington. Hilary Duff gave lap dances to a Joel Madden look-alike at Tenjune. Caroline Kennedy Schlossberg ran into her aunt Lee Radziwill at City Center.
Kelly Klein Finally Nabs That BabyGisele Bündchen showed up at the haunted house on Suffolk Street sans costume and cut the line. Hunter S. Thompson’s widow is pissed at Jann Wenner because he portrayed Hunter in his book as an “awful beast of a man” after he left Rolling Stone . Calvin Klein’s ex, Kelly, finally has a daughter, via surrogate mother. David Brooks, a.k.a. the guy who was recently busted for using company cash to fund his daughter’s $10 million bat mitzvah, also used his employees’ pension funds to pay for his son’s bar mitzvah. Hillary Clinton backed out of a Vogue photo shoot being shot by Annie Leibovitz because she felt it would be “too glamorous.” Sting and some buddies went to Scores. Bono and Damien Hirst dined at Lever House. Law & Order’s Richard Belzer had to get his driver to walk his poodle during a screening at Core Club because he wasn’t allowed to bring it in.