The Long Hand of the Trumps Slaps Madame Tussauds Right in Her Wax FaceIn the most hilarious press release we’ve received all week, today we learned that Ivanka Trump actually doesn’t send nail polish to Madame Tussauds weekly to spruce up the wax mannequin in her likeness. We can only imagine the nasty personal phone calls that the Donald made to some poor executive at Tussauds in order to cause them to squeak out this apology. They probably involved a lot of scathing sarcasm and scowling head bobs that you could just hear through the phone. Below, the statement:
Madame Tussauds New York would like to set the record straight. On Friday, the Daily News called and was inadvertently given incorrect information by a Tussauds employee. Unfortunately, the employee thought the Daily News was asking about a different figure. Madame Tussauds New York does not in fact have a figure of Ivanka Trump… yet. We apologize for the confusion. Madame Tussauds loves the Trumps and is very proud of its figures of Donald and Ivana Trump, as well as its more than 200 lifelike figures.
OH MY GOD — are they saying Ivana Trump is sending nail polish for her wax likeness at the museum? That’s even better!
Kristen Johnston Turns Forgetful Into FunnyFormer mayor Ed
Koch said his scariest moment in office was when a bunch of doctors threw eggs at his face during the Iran hostage crisis. Kristen
Johnston forgot her lines while performing at The 24 Hour Plays. Bill
Clinton said that he’d like to do a makeover of Grumpy Old Men with Bill Crystal if Hillary is elected president. An assortment of famous folks ate at both Le
Cirque and the Waverley Inn. Donald Trump’s brother, Robert,
and wife Blaine got a divorce. Ben
Affleck said he’d rather worship Satan than flip baseball-team loyalty à la Rudy Giuliani. Maybe fat Ryan Gosling hung out with a hot brunette at Rose Bar.
The Cutest Jailbird We Ever Did See
And how does New York commemorate Lindsay Lohan’s latest meltdown, which took place on the other coast? By dressing the Lohan wax sculpture at the Times Square Madame Tussauds in prison stripes. We kind of wish they’d redone the face, too, to match that crazy mug shot. Oh, well.