Mayor Bloomberg Is a Lady Gaga FanThe mayor drops knowledge on MTV, John Mayer and Mischa Barton have dinner in the same room, Kanye West goes spinning, and more gossip as celebrities descend on New York Fashion Week.
Stevie Cohen Could End Up in a PickleNo, not in the Damian Hirst sense, though that would be amazing: The art-loving SAC Capital Management CEO could have some problems with the SEC if he’s not careful. Plus! An ex–Bear CEO jumps ship at JPMorgan, Natalie Portman’s apartment goes on the block, and Condé Nast has a green issue, in our daily rundown of industry news.
Book Publishers Sadly Agree: Silda Not Likely to Tell AllBook publishers and editors agree that a Silda Spitzer tell-all is unlikely. Rachael Ray’s people disagree with yesterday’s Post item which claimed that Ray’s show may soon be canceled. Broadway vet Phillip Hoffman would like you to know that he is not the same person as actor Phillip Seymour Hoffman. The Duke of Westminster succeeded in getting British papers to drop rumors that he was Client 6 because libel laws are stricter in England. The owners of Cain, GoldBar, Upstairs, Marquee, and Butter had a poolside nightlife summit down in Cove Atlantis. Of all the times for there not to be a tidal wave.
Chuck Klosterman on the ‘Difference Between Hipsters and Retards’We admit it: We harbor a secret crush on Chuck Klosterman. He has a nerdy hotness about him not unlike what Natalie Portman must have seen in Moby. We even almost joined the Facebook group “If Chuck Klosterman spit in my face, I’d stop taking showers,” but then we promised our career counselor we wouldn’t. Er, anyway, last night we went to the Highline Ballroom for a reading of his upcoming novel, Downtown Owl (even though we found it a little hard to follow). Over the course of the next half hour, we learned a few things about our little demigod:
• Chuck used to have a few nicknames back in the day: Curtains (after a pair of unfortunate sweatpants his mom made him), Facehead (also interchangeable with Headface), and Joaquin Andujar.
• Chuck does not think that rock and roll is dead. In fact, he thinks “it is pretty good right now.”
• No one ever has sex in Chuck’s books because he identifies more with people being rejected.
• Chuck is going to be teaching in Germany for fourteen weeks and what he will miss most is his girlfriend.
We raised our hand to ask a question. So, how do nerdy guys get chicks? “Well,” Chuck said, “it’s like this. You used to be able to tell the difference between hipsters and homeless people. Now, it’s between hipsters and retards. I mean, either that guy in the corner in orange safety pants holding a protest sign and wearing a top hat is mentally disabled or he is the coolest fucking guy you will ever know.” And in that moment, nerdy Chuck Klosterman got just a little bit hotter. —Lauren Salazar
Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon Set a Bad ExampleJake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon texted on their BlackBerrys during the matinee show of August: Osage County before sneaking out at intermission. Criminal! Judith Regan is now suing the lawyers who are suing her for alleged unpaid fees. Anna Wintour sat courtside at the Knicks-Cavs game last night courtesy of LeBron James (she’s putting him on the cover of Vogue’s shape issue with Gisele in April). Jeremy Piven texted two separate models he met in New York to come meet him at the Mercer Hotel, though he didn’t know at the time that they knew each other. The Champagne Marilyn Monroe drank during her famous 1962 shoot was spiked with either drugs or vodka.
For ‘Lipstick Jungle’ Star, Life Imitates ArtLipstick Jungle actress Lindsay Price met LSV Advisors’ David Tisch at the Cynthia Rowley show last week, and they’ve been dating since. Scarlett Johansson refused to talk to an Us Weekly reporter because of the plastic-surgery cover they did of her. Bruce Willis hung out with Victoria’s Secret model Emma Heming at Marquee for Lauren Kucerak’s birthday party, where he tipped $100 a drink. Justin Timberlake was spotted shopping at Tiffany & Co. Natalie Portman showed up 45 minutes late to a vegan-shoe launch she was doing in Soho and only answered questions for five minutes.
Richard Arens Is Having His MomentFINANCE
• Trader Richard Arens, who runs a brokerage named ABS, made a vanity trade in order to push oil past the $100/barrel milestone. We’re sure the girls at the bar will be real impressed. [MarketBeat/WSJ]
• Citigroup will likely start laying off between 5 and 10 percent of its workforce next week, cutting as many as 32,000 jobs. Merrill Lynch plans to cut around 1,600. [CNBC]
• Former E*Trade CEO Mitch Caplan, who helped load the company with the subprime loans, made off with a $11 million golden parachute. Compare that with former H&R Block chief Mark Ernst, responsible for his own big subprime losses, who took home a paltry $2.5 million. [Deal Journal/WSJ, DealBook/NYT]
in other news
Portman, Stripper Experience Dog DramaIt’s a bad week for dog lovers. First, we learn that Natalie Portman’s beloved mutt, Charlie, has died. In an interview with the Syndey Telegraph, Portman told a reporter that the pooch she once described as “the only man in her life” is now passed away. (This is the adorable one she took on Letterman.) “I love dogs,” she lamented. “They’re better than people.” Man, when you’re right, you’re right. Then, we learn that a thief has stolen the two Malteses of a Scores stripper. “They’re my life. They’re everything to me,” said exotic dancer Daisy Rojas of little Charles and Darwin. “They’re my children.” Quoth the News:
Rojas said the dogs were tied to scaffolding with their matching Louis Vuitton leashes outside the Sofrito restaurant on E.57th St. near First Ave.
Rojas may not have taken her dogs on Letterman, but she takes them very seriously nonetheless. She had a portrait of herself painted with them, got a tattoo of their names in a secret body location (who knew strippers had those?), and she even had them baptized. “We’ll find those dogs,” vowed a police source. “We’re definitely going to take care of it.” Man, if there’s one thing cops will do anything for, it’s, um, dogs.
Poised Portman is Pretty Perfect [Sydney Daily Telegraph]
Scores Stripper’s 2 Pooches Dognapped on Upper East Side [NYDN]
Ew, Lance Armstrong Is Hooking Up with Ashley Olsen?Lance Armstrong and Ashley Olsen hooked up at Rose Bar and then left at 2 a.m. The Jewish Theater of New York claims that the Times won’t review its plays because the paper is anti-Semitic; the Times says it won’t review its plays because they are bad. Kim Cattrall actually showed up to work before the other SATC cast mates for once. AOL chairman and CEO Randy Falco was roasted by Bob Costas and Brian Williams, among others. Ivana Trump made a kind of funny joke about Harper’s Bazaar editor Glenda Bailey being the devil in Prada at Denise Rich’s Angel Ball. (Diddy also left the ball with model May Anderson.) Michael Jackson went to Brooklyn to shoot a cover for Ebony magazine and was sweet despite prattling on about how much he likes kids.
Heath and Michelle: Everything’s Wrong!Michelle Williams may be leaving Boerum Hill because the brownstone she lives in is too big for just her and the baby. A pregnant Nicole Richie smoked a cigarette outside Da Silvano. Ed Westwick, a.k.a. Chuck Bass on Gossip Girl, likes playing the bad boy. (Also, he’s British!) Ryan Gosling shopped for flannel shirts at the Urban Outfitters on West 14th and also set off the store alarm. Jennifer Hudson canoodled with New York Jets free safety Kerri Rhodes at Cipriani. Joan Rivers claims her apartment was once haunted by a Jewish ghost from Larchmont. Natalie Portman couldn’t flirt her way to a table at LES restaurant Apizz. The launch party of the Supper Club at the National Arts Club was way too hot.
‘Gossip Girl’ Star Chace Crawford Apparently Not Worried About His TruckAt the memorial service for former movie critic Joel Siegel, ABC anchor Charles Gibson noted that the Jewish Siegel sent the best Christmas cards. Gossip Girl star Chace Crawford got cozy with a “rude and nasty” Carrie Underwood at Marquee and a party at Soho Grand (not “Chance” Crawford, as reported by “Page Six”). Vanessa and Donald Trump Jr. dined at Gemma and drank at the Rose Bar in the Gramercy Park Hotel. Cindy Adams claims that members of John Edwards’s camp are “profoundly worried” about the recent allegations that Edwards strayed on his wife. David Lauren and Lauren Bush arrived via motorcycle to the Domino Bazaar Saturday.
Celebrity Diaspora: Jennifer Aniston Wants in on NYC, Too!Jennifer Aniston says she’d like to move to New York in the latest issue of Harper’s Bazaar. “I don’t know, I’m just tired of Los Angeles,” she told the fashion mag. “In New York, you’re not just in that same car, looking at that same dashboard, driving down the same street.” We know your first reaction is, What will the Jolie-Pitts think, since they’ve only just set up house here? But we think the bigger news is that there’s lately been a celebrity diaspora. Many stars are leaving their traditional homeland of Los Angeles and winding up living in exile in New York. After the Jolie-Pitts came Lindsay Lohan, who is a symbol of La La Land practically as important as Grauman’s Chinese Theater (and has welcomed nearly as many visitors).
J.Lo’s Pregnancy SpoilerJennifer Lopez will supposedly announce that she’s pregnant during her show at MSG on Saturday night. Jessica Simpson’s people say she didn’t drink and dash at the Box — her friend just accidentally took the receipt slip with him. Rosie O’Donnell did an impromptu ten-minute stand-up set during a show by Roseanne Barr at Comix. (Rita Crosby was there, despite having been served a subpoena earlier in the day.) Mariah Carey doesn’t know how many bathrooms are in her Tribeca penthouse. Howard Stein, the nightlife honcho behind eighties hangouts Xenon and Rock Lounge, died at 62. The Port Authority says the quality of its toilet paper is much improved, contrary to what Larry David said on last week’s episode of Curb. GLAAD forced “Page Six” to apologize for calling the pre-op transsexual who has a reality show on Fox a “she-male.”
it just happened
Natalie Portman’s New Man Likes Walks in the Park
It looks like the romance between Natalie Portman and Nathan Bogle that was first snapped at the U.S. Open, has legs! Literally — the pair were seen walking hand-in-hand through Central Park today, and damned if they weren’t caught by the paparazzi. Bogle, the model-cum-designer-cum-boyfriend (he used to design for Rag & Bone), is quite the looker, so kudos to Portman. According to JustJared.com, they’ve actually been dating for four months! We can only hope that photo-stalking of them remains at a minimum, so they stay in New York rather than decamp to Los Angeles where their every Starbucks will be dissected. Nothing would thrill us more than to see the couple out and about together in the West Village and not acknowledge them.
Nathan Bogle and Natalie Portman Holding Hands [JustJared]
Gay Slur at the ‘Times’!The top photo editor at the New York Times allegedly called a co-worker a faggot during an office party, and now she may lose her job. Jane Pratt showed up for a Playboy Bunny audition; she was told her tan wasn’t good enough. Campbell Brown is leaving NBC for CNN. Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony pride themselves on being “normal.” Hustler may publish the names of 30 politicians who frequented the D.C. madam. Natalie Portman wants you to know she does not get naked during Goya’s Ghost. Shakira wants her fiancé to sign a prenup. Calum Best played strip truth-or-dare with a “gorgeous, straight, black male” while Lindsay Lohan was in another room.
They’ll Always Have ParisParis, je t’aime — a collection of eighteen micro-mini shorts set in, and in tribute to, the French metropolis of croissants, angst, and amour — premiered at, natch, the Paris Theater on 58th Street last night. The shorts were made by brand-name auteurs — the Coen Brothers, Alexander Payne, Alfonso Cuarón, and Wes Craven among them — and a slew of boldfacers came out to walk Yves Saint Laurent–sponsored black carpet. (Black, rather than red, is apparently plus chic.) Natalie Portman was there, channeling Audrey Hepburn again, plus Maggie Gyllenhaal, Elijah Wood, Emily Mortimer, Steve Buscemi, Gena Rowlands, and Ben Gazzara. What are these New Yorkers top memories of the City of Light? Tales of excessive drinking, bad hairdressers, and, bien sur, the Eiffel Tower await after the jump.
Also, There Were Parties After the OscarsLeonardo DiCaprio, Ryan Gosling, and Vince Vaughn cruised the Vanity Fair Oscar party at Morton’s solo. (Everyone who is anyone was there.) Except Brad Pitt, who was a no-show at the Oscars despite having starred in Babel and been a producer on The Departed. Maggie Gyllenhaal and Peter Sarsgaard are leaving the West Village for Brooklyn because of the paparazzi. Meanwhile, in Brooklyn, Heath Ledger and Michelle Williams are fighting. Oprah says that Barack Obama didn’t start the Clinton-Geffen feud. Zero-star Kobe Club owner Jeffrey Chodorow has banned Frank Bruni from all 29 of his restaurants. At $70,000, a private soccer lesson with David Beckham was the lowest winning bid at Elton John’s Oscar-night AIDS benefit. Natalie Portman left an Oscars party with Gael García Bernal.