J.Lo’s OB/GYN Says Everything Was Easy Squeezy With Her DeliveryAs we lie in wait, desperately refreshing gossip Websites in the hopes that some or any information will pop up about Jennifer Lopez’s heaven-sent babies, we’ve begun to get a little depressed. She’s going to give them ridiculous names, we worry to ourselves. Two absurdly pretentious names. Each. Sure, we wouldn’t want them to have normal names. We love quirky one-namers like Cruz Beckham, Suri Cruise, and Phinnaeus Cameraman. But you just know J.Lo’s going to come up with something more along the lines of Tallulah Belle or Emerson Rose, who are lovely people but whom we can’t imagine rocking out in a limo with mohawks and splits of Champagne on their way to their first Communions. We want fireworks, not sweetness! And Life & Style confirms our worries — apparently, even their births were gentle. “Jennifer was amazing,” Dr. Anita Sadaty, J. Lo’s OB/GYN, told the mag. “She has this motherhood glow about her, very serene. Her boy and girl are healthy — and for that she feels so thankful and blessed.” Apparently, the girl popped out ten minutes before the boy, and the whole thing went off “without a hitch. There were no complications whatsoever.” Aw, crap. Looks like we’re going to have to wait until after their Disney-show downfalls to have any fun.
J.Lo’s Doctor Speaks: “She’s Simply Overjoyed!” [Pagesix.com]
Rachel Roy Is a Dash PreggersRachel Roy is pregnant. Gossip Girl’s Chace Crawford toasted new friend Carrie Underwood with Cristal at Southern Hospitality. Ew, they serve Cristal at that place? Katie Holmes took Suri to have frozen hot chocolate at Serendipity 3. 50 Cent and Lance Bass talked smack about each other’s books. Anna Wintour skimped on the food (only cheese sticks and almonds!) at her Style.com party on Tuesday. Prince Albert showed up at the “Grace, Princess of Monaco” exhibit at Sotheby’s.
Searching for Mrs. XHarvey Weinstein hired private eye Bo Dietl to try to figure out the real identity of The Nanny Diaries’ Mrs. X. New School prez Bob Kerrey seems likely to run for Senate again if Chuck Hagel quits. Jerry Lewis said that Merv Griffin deserved to die of prostate cancer. The fake feud between Kanye West and 50 Cent is officially over. Richard Gere thinks he could capture Bosnian war criminal Radovan Karadzic, even though NATO has unsuccessfully looked for him for a decade. (And James Brolin flies planes and builds houses.) Subscribers to the now-shuttered Jane magazine are getting Glamour instead, and ex Jane staffers are pissed. Katie Holmes fell and bruised herself after chasing Suri in Paris.
Suri Cruise Experiments With Child Stardom, Wall Streeters Do Same With HonestyFINANCE
• A new poll shows more than half of Wall Street traders would commit a felony for a $10 million profit. Now our trust in these guys is really shaken. [NYP]
• The Times outlines which funds are suffering the most — not that you should panic or anything. [NYT]
• Round two in the housing meltdown: Get foreclosed on a $100,000 mortgage, and you owe the IRS $33,000 for the “forgiven” debt. Fortunately, the Manhattan market is still red-hot. So no, you still can’t buy an apartment. [NYT, NYT]
iGreedySony chairman Howard Stringer called Steve Jobs “greedy” at the Allen & Co. conference. The main character of Doug Stumpf’s Confessions of a Wall Street Shoeshine Boy may be based on pervy billionaire Jeffrey Epstein. Katie Holmes and Suri Cruise went to the Biography Bookstore in the West Village and then to Magnolia. Joe DiMaggio’s brother Dom is not pleased the Yankee Clipper’s diaries are for sale. Stone Phillips is leaving Dateline, and he bought his longtime assistant an Audi as a parting gift. Matt Damon wants Al Gore to run for president. Ashlee Simpson helped beau Pete Wentz conquer his fear of flying so Wentz could get to the Hamptons via seaplane. Democratic Leadership Council Chairman Harold Ford Jr. hung out with Jay-Z, Nas, and Kid Rock in Southampton. Jennifer Connelly and Paul Bettany brought their 4-year-old to the Children’s Museum of Manhattan.
He Blew His Nose, and Then He Blew His MindKeith Richards snorted his father’s ashes. Ed Koch still hates Rudy Giuliani, now via e-mail. Paula Zahn and Richard Cohen have filed for divorce. Insiders blame the “Pale Male and Lola incident.” Cynthia Nixon rooted through a trash can in Riverside Park last week. Felix Rohatyn had an enthusiastic love life in his office at Lazard Freres, says a new tell-all about the firm. Julia Child didn’t care for the gays, according to a new biography. Kate Moss probably won’t make FHM’s sexiest-women list, but Keira Knightley and Sienna Miller are expected to rank high. Don’t forget, Jane Pratt had sex with Drew Barrymore.