Samm Levine, actor, Freaks and Geeks: “Rejected publicists running amok.”

Richard Lewis, actor-comedian-author: “Somehow, some way, Richard Nixon will make yet another political comeback – this time rising from the dead and running for mayor.”

Michael Capuzzo, author, Close to Shore: “Only five New Yorkers have been bitten by sharks since 1670. I’d say, Beware of neighbors and friends: New Yorkers bite each other an average of 1,500 times a year.”

Mickey Kaus, writer, kausfiles.com: “Ennui. The sudden realization that the Bush-Daschle era is terminally boring, everyone’s a centrist, history has ended, the streets are safe, and the art world has run out of ways to shock.”

Busta Rhymes, rapper-actor: “Peace!”

Andrew Solomon, author, The Noonday Demon: An Atlas of Depression: “Hatless, beardless, denuded Salvation Army Santa Clauses. I and every other gay man in New York will be stripping them of their ludicrous drag come the holidays; my fear is that after we’ve clocked them with their prinky little bells and rolled them into the gutter, they may become a traffic hazard.”