Down But Not Lo

Darva Conger, Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire?: “Ben should hook up with Britney, and Jen should have a fling with Colin Farrell (apparently everyone else is).”

Trish McDermott, co-founder, “For J.Lo, Nic Cage—bad enough and confident enough to take on a superdiva. For Ben, someone a little less ambitious: Jennifer Love Hewitt.” Bonnie Fuller, editorial director, American Media: “For Jen, Seal. He’s well-spoken, not into major publicity. As for Ben, someone who’s not a celebrity, like Matt Damon did with Ben’s former assistant Odessa Whitmire.”

Michael Musto, Village Voice columnist: “Jennifer Garner and Ben Chaplin, so they won’t have to throw out all those ‘Bennifer’ towels and napkins.”

Wendy “Queen of Dish” Williams, D.J., WBLS: “Jen should get with Matt Damon. How hurtful would that be? And Ben? Puff Daddy. They’d have a lot to talk about.”

Mike Walker, National Enquirer gossip editor: “Britney would be perfect with Ben at strip clubs—she drinks, smokes, and has lesbian-esque leanings. Ashton Kutcher can handle a mature woman. Ashton dumps Demi for Jen—imagine the headlines!”

Down But Not Lo