La Vie en Rosie

Keith Blanchard, editor, Maxim: “Rosie should take over Oprah. Call it Opie: personal empowerment with a lesbian twist. This month’s feature: ‘Home for the Holidays … With Anne Heche!’ ”

Helen Gurley Brown, former editor, Cosmopolitan: “I respect Rosie as a performer, and like her as a person, but I am not sure she should be editing any magazine.”

David Pecker, head of American Media: “Family Circle, because Gruner + Jahr should give her another chance. Or National Enquirer, because we can always use another Rosie source.”

Howard Kurtz, media writer, The Washington Post: “Rosie O’Donnell should take the helm at Sports Illustrated. She clearly knows how to play the game with her spikes on.”

Trenton Straube, editor, HX: “We’d like to see how Leigh Bowery and Boy George have influenced Rosie’s take on makeup. So, Allure.”

Lady Bunny, drag queen: “I didn’t even know she’d ever edited a magazine. I guess I’d have to pick one I’d want closed. Certainly nothing about women’s fashion.”

Janice Min, editor, Us Weekly: “I hear there might be an opening at Martha Stewart Living soon.”

La Vie en Rosie