Sports: Mighty Krishna Has Struck Out

In retrospect, it was remarkable that either team made it to the softball game between Blackout Books and the Hare Krishnas. It’s always tough to organize such events, even when they don’t involve a matchup between anarchists and spiritualists. Still, as Team Anarchy gathered in Tompkins Square Park one recent Saturday, waiting in vain for their opponents to show, they could be excused for losing some of their revolutionary zeal. “Damn,” said Alia Habib. “This could have been great publicity.”

The contest had been in the works for weeks. Even Kapindra Swami had described the plan as “a very loving thought,” and though he couldn’t allow his disciples to play – “Sporting games are against the science of Krishna,” he explained – he did authorize the Cro-Mags, a Krishna-friendly former punk band, to serve as stand-ins. What had started as an in-joke between neighbors became the talk of Avenue B.

But an hour after the game was scheduled to start, there was still no sign of the Cro-Mags. Everyone offered a theory – they’d snuck out of town, or had been running a hoax – but no one took action. “We’re anarchists,” they kept saying. “We don’t have leaders.”

Louis Colombo, who’d organized the event (but skipped it to visit his grandmother), called his teammates to say, “Can’t you just pretend that the game really happened?”

As it later turned out, the Swami had been rushed to an ashram upstate for a homeopathic cure; his stand-ins, admitted captain John Joseph, had “totally spaced out on the game.”

Until the game is restaged, Kapindra Swami has been doing his best to psych out the challengers. “The real revolution,” he has been reminding them, “is in the soul.”

Sports: Mighty Krishna Has Struck Out