this thing's incredible

These Zesty Canned Tomatoes Make the World’s Greatest Salsa

Photo: Bettmann/Bettmann Archive

When I feel the sweat dripping down my legs on a stalled subway train, I can only think of the one time in my life that I truly liked summer: high school. Then, July and August meant getting tan, teaching tennis to 3-year-olds, no school or homework, my hair smelling like chlorine, and long weekends at my friend Jackie’s house in Rockford, Illinois. We’d pile onto her huge couch in the basement, marathon movies, and eat tons of her mom’s delicious salsa.

Jackie’s mom’s salsa had just the right hit of jalapeño, copious amounts of cilantro, and big, chunky tomatoes that tasted inexplicably fresh and juicy, even out of season. I can never be that young, carefree, tan, or hormonal again, but I can still enjoy that salsa — a standard combo of cilantro, jalapeños, lime juice, and spices. But the one nonnegotiable ingredient was that special can of tomatoes: Dei Fratelli’s Chopped Mexican Tomatoes and Jalapeños. Jackie’s mom had heard about them from a friend and never wavered in her loyalty; luckily, they can be found at any grocery store in the Midwest.

In New York, it’s virtually impossible to buy them without going online. In my attempt to re-create the salsa, I tried chopped fresh tomatoes (too much like pico de gallo) and then canned-tomato substitutes, but none of them were seasoned right (even the “Mexican”-flavored ones). They’d all be too bland, too metallic-tasting, or too processed. Finally, I relented and bought a few cans of Dei Fratelli online — Amazon’s funny pricing means that 12 cans cost $29, while 6 cans cost $22 — and remembered why Dei Fratelli’s are the only tomatoes I should ever use. It has that jalapeño kick, a zippy bit of seasoning with garlic, cilantro, and onion, and the very freshest-tasting tomatoes. I since discovered that Dei Fratelli’s tomatoes are sourced from local-ish growers (you can see some of the families on their site) in Ohio and Michigan that practice sustainable farming, which probably explains that ineffable flavor. I’ve since made the salsa (this recipe is similar) for friends, brought it to rooftop parties, and enjoyed it in the air-conditioning of my own apartment. And you know what? It’s always a hit.

If you’re looking for a healthy snack to keep at the office, try these chipotle-lime peanuts. They “have a nice kick, thanks to smoky chipotle, cayenne peppers, and lime flavoring. Plus, they pair well with (totally healthy) beer.”

Writer Rima Suqi found something even better than beef jerky: “For the uninitiated, biltong is the African version of jerky, and looks like long flakes of beef. As the package states, it has the tender, thin texture of prosciutto (nothing like the jaw-tiring dryness of regular beef jerky), with tasty flavorings that are so much more interesting than ‘Teriyaki’ or ‘Black Pepper.’ Kalahari biltong is seasoned with a blend of vinegar, pepper, coriander, peri-peri chili seasoning, and sea salt; marinated; and then air-dried in a climate-controlled room for 18 days.”

Did you know it’s possible to buy a version of uncooked ramen noodles to snack on? Writer Laura Bannister introduced us to Mamee Monster Noodles: “It is, indisputably, the best speedy noodle I’ve ever sampled — and it takes no time at all. Produced by a Malaysian snack-food company, the light, non-oily treat comes in plastic, purse-size packaging, much like regular instant ramen noodles. There’s a difference, though; no ‘cooking’ is involved (and you don’t need a spoon). Mamee’s hardened, squiggly strips — condensed into a tight, square block — are designed to be eaten as is, much like deep-fried potato chips.”

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These Zesty Canned Tomatoes Make the World’s Greatest Salsa